NOVA SCOTIA- Nouvelle-Écosse- Episode 01: Georges Island - Part One
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8QRvxN1_Jc
NOVA SCOTIA- Nouvelle-Écosse- Episode 01: Georges Island - Part Two
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxzfO0qd1-E
NOVA SCOTIA- Nouvelle-Écosse- Episode 01: Georges Island - Part Three
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TgStta_zlog
Situated in Halifax Harbour, Georges Island was established as a military garrison to defend the city of Halifax and Nova Scotia. Its fortifications have been strengthened over the years. It currently no longer functions as a military installation. It is operated by Parks Canada but remains off limits to the public. The event, "Explore Georges Island," has attracted visitors to tour the island and its fortifications. This episode includes the tour of Fort Charlotte on the island.
EXPULSION OF ACADIANS... WERE KEPT ON GEORGES ISLAND NOVA SCOTIA 1700S
---------------
CLASSIFIED'S GOING TO PLAY AT GEORGES ISLAND FOLKS...
Classified--SAT JUL 27, 2013 - 11:00 AM
Smirnoff Red Door Island Party-George's Island-Halifax, Canada
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGhyL8zg3_I
http://www.classifiedofficial.com/
COMMENT:
George's Island just had a fantastic historical picnic.... DO U KNOW HOW RARE... IT IS... 2 get 2 even visit... let alone perform..... leave it 2 history and Classified to rock George's Island... folks... Classified's got Canada tattooed across his soul and Nova Scotia etched in his heart.... and RUSSIA WINTER OLYMPICS.... NEEDS CANADA'S CLASSIFIED 2 KICK SOME CANADIAN ASS WITH - O CANADA BABY!!!! what ya say... from 6 to 96... Canada will be watching.... hay fans... how about some feedback - it's a wonderful Classified day folks
ARTICLE:
GEORGE'S ISLAND- NOVA SCOTIA Nouvelle-Écosse - 1700s- Explusion of Acadians- War 1812
Tunnel tours, history lessons all part of Picnic in the Past
July 20, 2013 - 7:35pm By MICHAEL LIGHTSTONE Staff Reporter
J. R. Fougere, dressed as an 1812-era Royal Marines corporal, fires a musket during a demonstration at the Picnic in the Past event on Georges Island. (RYAN TAPLIN / Staff)
.
There she blows — Georges Island — out in Halifax Harbour, steeped in history and beckoning boatloads of picnickers and walkers.
Families, couples, and individuals explored the little isle Saturday during a weekend "picnic in the past" event that winds up Sunday.
Armed with 21st-century backpacks and hand-held gizmos, sun-baked visitors checked out the island’s military remnants, took cellphone photos of friends or relatives or scenery, and tucked into a picnic lunch during a hot and humid afternoon.
IN PHOTOS: An afternoon at Picnic in the Past
BLOG REPLAY: A trip to Georges Island
There’s a lot of history in the place. It was a military site from the 1700s to the Second World War, and it is the oval mound where thousands of Acadians were imprisoned at various times following the 1755 expulsion order issued by the British.
The island became a national historic site in 1965, according to Parks Canada.
Saturday’s visitors soaked in vistas from grassy hilltops and watched demonstrations provided by men and women in period dress. Many sightseers joined guided tours, others chose to stroll around on their own.
Aside from appreciating heritage and the glorious harbour setting, lots of picnickers pre-ordered lunch through a promotion hooked to the province’s buy-local marketing campaign.
Georges tourist Amit Rahalkar said he recently moved to Halifax. Scanning the panoramic scene in front of him, he said the day trip was worthwhile.
Adult tickets cost $15; Saturday’s trips were sold out.
"It’s a very nice little island," Rahalkar said. "The view’s good, there’s a good breeze (and) it’s a great day to be out here."
Andrew Ahler, a lifelong Haligonian, said he’d never been to Georges Island. He said he enjoyed a tour of the site’s tunnels.
"It was cool to go through and see how they constructed that, and the big artilleries," he said.
Georges Island was the first fortified place in the Halifax region, a Parks Canada official said.
"It was the birthplace of Halifax, in fact," David Danskin told The Chronicle Herald. "This is where (colonial Brits) first came" before settling on the mainland.
Danskin, manager of visitor experience for the Halifax defence complex, said Parks Canada staff will be assessing the weekend event.
He acknowledged "it’s a challenge," logistically, to prepare the island for visitors. It’s not normally open to the public, Danskin said, though it has been made available.
The event went smoothly for most ticket buyers, but one group of island goers was on a vessel in the harbour for about an hour. It was one of two auxiliary boats organizers needed to supplement the lone vessel that had been ferrying people during earlier trips.
A docking issue at the island’s wharf prompted the boat’s captain to abort his initial offload plan. A second attempt proved successful, and allowed passengers of all ages — several of them quite grumpy at this point — to finally disembark.
Tickets for Sunday’s trips to Georges are sold out.
http://thechronicleherald.ca/metro/1143498-tunnel-tours-history-lessons-all-part-of-picnic-in-the-past
AND...
Party with the Trews on Georges Island
NOW HEAR THIS
For East Coast rock and roll fans, it doesn’t seem like summer without the Trews stepping onto an outdoor stage, and the one they’ve picked this weekend is a do ozy.
On Sunday, the Antigonishbred, Toronto-based quartet headlines the second of a pair of afternoon shows on Halifax’s historic Georges Island, inside the grasscovered walls of Fort Charlotte, with the Stanfields, Gloryhound and the Town Heroes .
The Smirnoff Red Door Island Party is only the second time a public concer t has b een held in the site, following last year’s packed Tall Ships weekend show with Hey Rosetta! and Ben Caplan & the Casual Smokers.
"I’ve never set foot on Georges Island before, let alone played on it, so I’m looking forward to it," says Trews singer-guitarist Colin MacDonald, whose show follows Saturday’s lineup of Classified, Rich Aucoin , Sticks and D e zza .
"I hear there are snakes there, so that’s pretty cool. Or maybe they were just referring to the bands."
Full details about the shows, including ticket info, set times (both shows run from around noon to 5 p.m.) and ferry departures (first boat leaves Bishop’s Landing at 11 a.m.) can be found at smirnoffreddoorislandparty.ca.
Sunday’s set is one of only a handful of appearances this summer for MacDonald and his brother John-Angus, bassist Jack Syperek and drummer Sean Dalton, including the Ontario cottage country mainstay Kee to Bala concert in Muskoka. But that doesn’t mean the Trews are on vacation.
"We’re making an album right now, writing and demoing , and we plan to be in the studio around September and October," says MacDonald. "So this summer’s been pretty light in terms of shows."
What makes the next Trews project different is the fact it’s the first the band has funded through the growing trend of crowdsourcing. In the past, the band has had major label assistance from either the Canadian arm of Sony Music or Universal Music, and was recently singled out as the top recipient of the federal government’s FACTOR grants (a.k.a. the Foundation to Assist Canadian Talent on Record) over the course of the past decade, to the tune of over $600k, much to the consternation of the band’s non-fans.
S o the band is star ting with a clean slate, with a PledgeMusic campaign that’s essentially preselling the next record to fans and offering special incentives to thos e who want to show a little more love than a 10-spot for a download. After T-shir ts and autographed albums, premiums go up the scale from one of Jack’s hats for $300 to having the Trews play in your living room for $ 7,500.
The band has involved its audience before, as on a previous concert tour where the show’s s econd half was made up entirely of requests made via Twitter, but this is s omething on a whole different level.
The Trews aren’t the first act to reach out to fans via PledgeMusic; musicians who’ve raised funds via the site range from post-punk pioneers Gang of Four to Canadian pop diva Martha Wainwright. MacDonald and his bandmates were clued into PledgeMusic by an item from music industry insider Bob Lefsetz, whose regular emailed newsletter is required reading for anyone in the biz, and Trews manager Larry Wanagas got the ball rolling.
"They were launching PledgeMusic in Canada, so we went and had dinner with its founder, Benji Rogers, and he was everything Bob said: a really kind, cool person who was both a musician and a former record label guy, and he sold us on this idea," says MacDonald. "We definitely got behind it, but only after we’d met with him .
"It kinda happened at a time when we were between record labels, we decided to leave Universal because we weren’t getting much support from them anymore, and it seemed like the whole major label system is crumbling these days. We didn’t want to rely on that anymore, so we thought we’d just take control of as much of the whole thing as we can and get the fans involved. If they want another Trews album, they can buy it before it’s even recorded."
As of this writing , the campaign is at 71 per cent of the goal with 24 days left to go, helped by a comedic video on the pledgemusic. com website that lays out for the viewer why the band is going this route.
"We kind of wrestled with how we were going to present this, but we pu lled it o ff thanks to our drummer Sean, who’s really good buddies with Nick Sexton, who works on The Rick Mercer Report, and they’ve done funny videos together in the past," MacDonald explains.
"The only way we could do this was if we tried to make it really hilarious, and Sean’s got a natural gift for being funny, and Nick help ed us write it and put it together. We didn’t want to be too serious about it, and having a laugh turned out to be the best way to go. I’m happy with the way it turned out ."
PHOTO
Antigonish-bred band the Trews will perform on Georges Island this weekend. For show details and ferry departure times visit smirnoffreddoorislandparty.ca.
--------------------------
MEN BREAKING THE CHAINSCHECK OUT- breaking the chains of abuse- CLASSIFIED'S NEW VIEW 3foot tall-- OFFICIAL VIDEO
OH MY GOD.... CLASSISIFIED HAS THE BEST BULLY VIDEO E-VA- Break the chains of abuse
VIBE Premiere: Classified '3 Foot Tall' Video-OFFICIAL VIDEO
VIBE Posted July 23, 2013 -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BV_b9zTUvs&feature=player_embedded
In the follow-up to his chart-topping single "Inner Ninja," rapper Classified doesn't fall short of delivering his message on "3 Foot Tall." In the video, the Canadian spitter recruits a pint-sized voice box to battle against negative verbal warfare. "When you're alone, life can be a little rough/ It makes you feel like you're 3 foot tall/ When it's just you, well times can be tough/ When there's no one there to catch your fall," sings the toddler with a faux black eye. With words like "dummy," "loser," and the more sexually charged "faggot" and "lesbian" sprawled across the clip, the writings on the wall come at a time where digital bullying has run rampant in the younger generation, especially with the presence of social media. Still, it's the ability to overcome that stands above all. Watch the rapper also known as Luke Boyd preach the good word in the video below. - See more at: http://www.vibe.com/article/classified-3-foot-tall-video#sthash.q3GzUtE2.dpuf
http://www.vibe.com/article/classified-3-foot-tall-video
------------------------------
VANCOUVER - ONE BILLION RISING- breaking the chains- putting victim's first
MacKay vows to help victims of crime
The new federal justice minister says many victims of crime continue to feel re-victimized by the courts, and more needs to be done to help them get on with their lives.
Peter MacKay was in Vancouver today, meeting with police, lawyers and victims of crime to discuss the government’s plan to introduce a victims’ bill of rights this fall.
MacKay said that while the government has made progress addressing the needs o f victims, a bill o f rights will help thos e within the criminal justice system better protect thos e rights. (CP)
--------------------------------
CANADIAN PURE- Classified- OFFICAL VIDEO- 3 Foot tall- MEN BREAKING CHAINS OF ABUSE
ONE BILLION RISING- breaking the chains of abuse and bullying- CHECK OUT- MEN breaking the chains of abuse- bullying - KIDS STAND AGAINST BULLYING-
VIBE Premiere: Classified '3 Foot Tall' Video
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=641632725854753&set=a.153203521364345.32932.100000240949070&type=1&theater
CHECK OUT- breaking the chains of abuse- CLASSIFIED'S NEW VIEW 3foot tall- MEN BREAKING THE CHAINS
OH MY GOD.... CLASSISIFIED HAS THE BEST BULLY VIDEO E-VA- Break the chains of abuse
VIBE Premiere: Classified '3 Foot Tall' Video-OFFICIAL VIDEO
VIBE Posted July 23, 2013 -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BV_b9zTUvs&feature=player_embedded
In the follow-up to his chart-topping single "Inner Ninja," rapper Classified doesn't fall short of delivering his message on "3 Foot Tall." In the video, the Canadian spitter recruits a pint-sized voice box to battle against negative verbal warfare. "When you're alone, life can be a little rough/ It makes you feel like you're 3 foot tall/ When it's just you, well times can be tough/ When there's no one there to catch your fall," sings the toddler with a faux black eye. With words like "dummy," "loser," and the more sexually charged "faggot" and "lesbian" sprawled across the clip, the writings on the wall come at a time where digital bullying has run rampant in the younger generation, especially with the presence of social media. Still, it's the ability to overcome that stands above all. Watch the rapper also known as Luke Boyd preach the good word in the video below. - See more at: http://www.vibe.com/article/classified-3-foot-tall-video#sthash.q3GzUtE2.dpuf
LINKS ON BULLYING AND CHILD ABUSE- (Mind Rape/Physical Torture/Sexual Assault)
FOR KIDS- TWEENS-TEENS-YOUNGBLOODS- But perhaps most of all..... each and every Canadain Adult- we must take more responsibility and be more vigilant:
To learn more about bullying and if u r being abused- check out:
www.stopcyberbullying.org
www.cyberbullying.novascotia.ca
www.prevnet.ca
www.cpha.ca/en/activities/safe-schools.aspx
http://needhelpnow.ca/app/en/ AND http://needhelpnow.ca/app/fr/
RespectED: Violence & Abuse Prevention
http://www.redcross.ca/article.asp?id=000294
www.kidshelpphone.ca
If you are a victim of bullying, call The Kids Help Phone at 1-800-668-6868.
CANADIANS MUST BECOME VERY VIGILANT AGAINST BULLYING OF OUR CHILDREN, TWEENS, TEENS AND YOUNGBLOODS BY PEERS........ it's time....
ON BULLYING...... please call for help darlins...... each and every one of u are angels...... our angels..... Canada needs each and every child, tween, teen, youngblood..... we truly do.... please...call us ...... don't give up on grownups...... please don't ..
LINKS FOR CANADA'S YOUNGBLOODS
please...... CALL TODAY..... AND BY GOD WE WILL STOP THIS INSIDIOUS AND SLITHERING EVIL.......SOUL STEALERS..... BULLIES = COWARDS....
To learn more about bullying, check out:
www.stopcyberbullying.org
www.cyberbullying.novascotia.ca
www.prevnet.ca
www.cpha.ca/en/activities/ safe-schools.aspx www.kidshelpphone.ca If you are a victim of bullying, call The Kids Help Phone at 1-800-668-6868 .
CALL:
KIDSHELPPHONE.CA 1-899-688-6868
Kids Help Phone Promise
All calls we receive are anonymous and confidential.
Anonymous means that you don't have to tell us your:
Name
Phone number
Address
We don't have caller ID, so we can't track your call.
Confidential means "in the vault." It's just between you and the counsellor, no matter what. Our service is about helping you, not spreading your secrets around.
Really?
Really. We take your privacy very seriously.
Are you going to rat me out?
No. Even if you've done something that you're worried about, you can trust us to keep it private.
But?
The only time we would ever go against our anonymous and confidential promise is if you tell us that someone is hurting you, has hurt you, or is likely to hurt you in the future, AND you give us personal info, like your name or address. We can't get anyone else involved if you choose to stay anonymous. We will also need to report it if you tell us you are planning to hurt yourself or someone else, or if you have committed a crime--but remember, you have to tell us who you are for us to do that.
Why?
It is illegal for counsellors not to report abuse situations to the police, but they would have to know who you are and what is happening to you in order to report the abuse.
Ready to talk? 1-800-668-6868
If you are not ready to talk, Ask Us Online might be the place for you.
-----------------
CANADA SHOWED THIS DOCUMENTARY AS A MOVIE ALL ACROSS CANADA- MANY STATES IN USA REFUSED AT THE BEGINNING- DID NOT WANT THE PROFILE...
Bully Trailer Official 2012 [1080 HD]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUy2ZWoStr0
Bully doc buoyed by teen's petition, PG rating in B.C.
-----------------
AND... global heroes- ANONYMOUS- HUNTERS OF BULLIES... VICIOUS CYBERBULLIES WHO ENJOY DESTROYING OTHER KIDS- ALSO ANONYMOUS HAUNTS AND HUTS PAEDOPHILES/SEX TRAFFICKERS- THE EVIL THAT SCOURS THIS PLANET THAT UNITED NATIONS HIDES....
#OpJustice4Rehtaeh Statement Anonymous / Rehtaeh Parsons
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbwrmUBGm8k
Anonymous engaged #OpJustice4Rehtaeh this morning in response to the suicide of Rehtaeh Parsons. Justice Minister Ross Landy says that it is important for Nova Scotians to have faith in their justice system. Mr. Landy, justice is in your hands.
Anonymous has confirmed the identities of two of the four alleged rapists. We are currently confirming a third and it is only a matter of time before the fourth is identified as well.
Our demands are simple: We want the N.S. RCMP to take immediate legal action against the individuals in question. We encourage you to act fast. If we were able to locate these boys within 2 hours, it will not be long before someone else finds them.
We do not approve of vigilante justice as the media claims. That would mean we approve of violent actions against these rapists at the hands of an unruly mob. What we want is justice. And That's your job. So do it.
The names of the rapists will be kept until it is apparent you have no intention of providing justice to Retaeh's family. Please be aware that there are other groups of Anons also attempting to uncover this information and they may not to wish to wait at all. Better act fast.
Be aware that we will be organizing large demonstrations outside of your headquarters. The rapists will be held accountable for their actions. You will be held accountable for your failure to act.
AND...
Protect Yourself Online
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPibW3GuehU
Protect yourself against online crimes such , identity theft and cyberbullying. For more information, Kontakt me.Special Work with special Web Pages......#OpJustice4Rehtaeh...Gang raped then bullied relentlessly, a girl? hung herself, Anonymous is? tracking the perps down..READ WHAT HER FATHER SAY : http://thechronicleherald.ca/metro/11...
THANK U ANONYMOUS
Rehtaeh Parsons was my daughter
April 10, 2013 - 6:06pm By GLEN CANNING
Rehtaeh Parsons father, Glen Canning, has posted a statement to his blog about his daughter's death.
.
EDITOR’S NOTE: This is a post from the blog of Glen Canning, Rehtaeh Parsons’s father, in response to media inquiries about his daughter’s death. Canning posted this on April 10.
My daughter was three years old when we went to watch Babe: Pig in the City. There’s a part in the movie when Babe knocks over a goldfish bowl and the fish falls onto the floor and starts flopping around. When this happened Rae suddenly stood up on her chair in the movie theatre and started screaming for someone to help the fish. She cried for it as I tried to reassure her Babe would help (thank God he did) and that the fish would be alright.
That was the nature of my daughter Rehtaeh. She was like that her whole life. I couldn’t go for a walk in Halifax with her without her asking me for change to give to someone in need. She was always looking out for people or animals that needed help. She called Animal Control Services on our neighbors because they left their dog outside too long. Her room and her life was always full of little creatures.
Sometimes her heart was too big, sometimes it scared me.
They say parents need to teach their children. Instead, it was Rehtaeh who was my teacher. My precious gift. She was the absolute best part of my life.
There’s a wooden box in my house that holds all the memories I have of my beautiful little girl. The outfit she wore home from the hospital, a hand print in clay, art, school cards and drawings, mementoes of her life. Even a newspaper dated December 9th, 1995, the day she came into this world.
I tried to keep it all for her, to have someday when she grew up and had her own family. That day will never come.
Rehtaeh died April 7th at 11:15 PM. She was 17 years old.
She died struggling to live, much as she spent the last 18 months. She hung on right to the very end, when the nurses were telling us if she couldn’t be declared brain dead soon they couldn’t use her as an organ donor. We couldn’t wait any longer. She couldn’t live any longer. And right at the last moment there was a change in her blood pressure as the last part of her brain gave away. She knew she had to leave. It was time to let go and find peace.
It was so like her to hang on right up until the very last second. To give us all a chance to hold her hand, wipe her tears away, and kiss her beautiful face for the last time.
I tried my best to save my daughter’s life. I believe that in my heart.
I asked her repeatedly what I could do, was I doing enough, what did she want from me? She said she just wanted me to be her dad. To make her laugh. To do everything possible to keep a part of her life normal. She said it helped more than I could ever know.
I prayed for the best while I prepared her for the worst. We went to counseling together. Sometimes I was the drive, sometimes the father, sometimes the counselor.
The worst nightmare of my life has just begun. I loved my beautiful baby with all my heart. She meant everything to me. I felt her heart beating in my soul from the moment she was born until the moment she died. We were a team. We were best pals. We often sat on my couch and laughed until we could hardly speak. When we weren’t together she would call me or text me every single day, just to say hi, to say she loved me. The life I had with my daughter was a rare thing. It was wonderful, it consumed me. I was defined by it. It made my life rich and beautiful.
She was amazing.
Yesterday I looked at another wooden box. It will hold her ashes. I hate it.
I had to write something about this. I don’t want her life to defined by a Google search about suicide or death or rape. I want it to be about the giving heart she had. Her smile. Her love of life and the beautiful way in which she lived it.
I found out this afternoon my daughter saved the life of a young woman with her heart. How fitting.
She also gave someone a new liver, a kidney, a new breath, and a new chance to love. She saved the lives of four people with her final gift of life. She was that wonderful.
Someone out there is going to look at the world with my daughter’s eyes. The most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.
To the Justice Minister of Nova Scotia
Rehtaeh Parsons thought the worst outcome for her case would be no charges against the men who raped her but we all know better. The worst thing that could happen would be charges. That they would be found guilty, and that Rehtaeh would sit on a court bench and listen in utter disbelief as they were given parole, or a suspended sentence, or community service. All for completely destroying her life while they laughed.
Why is it they didn’t just think they would get away with it; they knew they would get away with it. They took photos of it. They posted it on their Facebook walls. They emailed it to God knows who. They shared it with the world as if it was a funny animation.
How is it possible for someone to leave a digital trail like that yet the RCMP don’t have evidence of a crime? What were they looking for if photos and bragging weren’t enough?
Why was this treated like a minor incident of bullying rather than a rape? Isn’t the production and distribution of child porn a crime in this country? Numerous people were emailed that photo. The police have that information (or at least they told us they did). When someone claims they were raped is it normal to wait months before talking to the accused?
You have the opportunity here to do something good and lets face it; the court system in Nova Scotia was just going to rape her all over again with indifference to her suffering and the damage this did to her.
My daughter wasn’t bullied to death, she was disappointed to death. Disappointed in people she thought she could trust, her school, and the police.
She was my daughter, but she was your daughter too.
For the love of God do something.
***I’ve been contacted from media outlets from all over the world and as a past member of the media I understand why you all want to speak with me. You have all been very courteous, professional, and respectful. Please know, however, this is the only statement I am able to make. I’m too devastated.***
I feel like I’m dead inside.
-------------------------------------
Canada - Provinces and Territories, flags, coat of arms, name and data:
Credit for all of this goes to Curtis Sanderson of Canada4life dot com
Nova Scotia
Name:
Nova Scotia is Latin for New Scotland. The name was used in the royal charter that originally granted the land to Sir William Alexander in 1621. The charter was written in Latin
Flag:
The flag of Nova Scotia was granted by royal charter in 1625. It bears the cross and coat of arms of St. Andrew of Scotland. These symbols show the provinces historical ties to Scotland. It is based on the provincial coat of arms.
Coat of Arms:
Nova Scotia's coat of arms was granted in 1625. It has the same symbols as the flag on a shield in the centre. The Indian represents the province's first inhabitants. A royal unicorn symbolizes England.
Capital city: Halifax Joined confederation: 1 July, 1867 Official motto: Munit Haec et Altera Vincit - One Defends and the other conquers Area: 55,284 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 0.55 percent Population: 908,007 people Population density: 17.2 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 3.02 percent Official flower: Mayflower Official bird: Osprey Official tree: Red Spruce
Alberta
Name:
Alberta was named in honour of Queen Victoria's third daughter, Princess Louise Caroline Alberta, in 1882. She was the wife of the Marquis of Lorne, governor general at the time.
Flag:
The flag of Alberta was adopted in 1968. It is blue with the shield from the provincial coat of arms in the centre
Coat of Arms
The Alberta coat of arms was adopted in 1907. The shield has a cross of St. George, which represents Alberta's link with Britain, and a landscape with mountains, hills, a prairie, and a field of wheat. The lion and antelope supporting the shield, and a crest including a helmet, a beaver, and a crown were added in 1980
Capital city: Edmonton Joined confederation: 1 September, 1905 Official motto: Fortis et Liber - Strong and Free Area: 661,848 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 6.63 percent Population: 2,974,807 people Population density: 4.6 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 9.91 percent Official flower: Wild Rose Official bird: Horned Owl Official tree: Lodgepole Pine
British Columbia
Name:
At one time, British Columbia was known as New Caledonia in the North and Columbia in the South. To avoid confusion with Colombia in South America, and the island of New Caledonia in the Pacific, Queen Victoria Changed the name to British Columbia in 1858
Flag:
The flag of British Columbia was adopted in 1960. It has a design similar to that of the shield of the province's coat of arms
Coat of Arms:
The coat of arms of British Columbia was originally adopted in 1906 and was revised in 1987. Its royal lion, crown, and Union Jack all symbolize the provinces link to Britain. The wavy blue bars represent the pacific ocean. The setting sun represents the province's location as the most western province. The elk and the sheep are animals found in the province
Capital city: Victoria Joined confederation: 20 July, 1871 Official motto: Splendor Sine Occasu - Splendor Without Diminishment Area: 944,735 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 9.46 percent Population: 3,907,738 people Population density: 4.2 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 13.02 percent Official flower: Pacific Dogwood Official bird: Steller's Jay Official tree: Western Red Cedar
Manitoba
Name:
Manitoba comes from the Cree words Manitou bou, which mean narrows of the great spirit. The name refers to where Lake Manitoba narrows in its centre
Flag
The flag of Manitoba was adopted in 1965. It's red with the Union Jack in the top left and the provincial shield on the right
Coat of Arms:
The coat of arms of Manitoba was adopted 1905. In the centre of the arms is the provincial shield with the cross of Saint George and a buffalo standing on a rock. Above the shield is the gold helmet signalling Manitoba's co-sovereign status in Confederation. On the very top is a beaver holding the province's floral emblem and carrying a royal crown on its back. The supporters are a unicorn and a white horse. The seven provincial flowers in the middle near the bottom represent one province made up of many diverse origins
Capital city: Winnipeg Joined confederation: 15 July, 1870 Official motto: Gloriosus et Liber - Glorious and Free Area: 647,797 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 6.49 percent Population: 1,119,583 people Population density: 2.0 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 3.73 percent Official flower: Prairie Crocus Official bird: Great Gray Owl Official tree: White Spruce
New Brunswick
Name:
New Brunswick was named in 1784 in honour of the reigning monarch, King George III, who was also Duke of Brunswick
Flag
New Brunswick was named in 1784 in honour of the reigning monarch, King George III, who was also Duke of Brunswick
Coat of Arms
New Brunswick's coat of arms was adopted in 1968. The shield has a British lion symbolizing New Brunswick's ties to Britain. The galley represents shipbuilding and seafaring, which are both important in the province's history. A crest and supporters were added in 1984. The crest is a salmon bearing St. Edward's crown. Two white tailed deer support the shield
Capital city: Fredericton Joined confederation: 1 July, 1867 Official motto: Spem Reduxit - Hope Restored Area: 72,908 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 0.73 percent Population: 729,498 people Population density: 10.2 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 2.43 percent Official flower: Purple Violet Official bird: Chickadee Official tree: Balsam Fir
Newfoundland... Canada's Oldest
Name:
Newfoundland was named by King Henry VII, who referred to John Cabot's discovery in 1497 as the New Found Launde
Flag:
The flag of Newfoundland was adopted in 1980. The blue section represents Newfoundland's ties to Britain and the red and gold symbolize hope for the future, with the arrow pointing the way
Coat of Arms:
Newfoundland's coat of arms was granted by King Charles I of England in 1637 and was adopted as a provincial symbol in 1928. The shield has two lions and two unicorns representing Britain. The indians symbolize Newfoundland's first inhabitants
Capital city: St. John's Joined confederation: 31 March, 1949 Official motto: Quaerite Prime Regnum Dei - Seek Ye First the Kingdom of God Area: 405,212 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 4.06 percent Population: 512,930 people Population density: 1.4 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 1.70 percent Official flower: Pitcher Plant Official bird: Atlantic Puffin Official tree: Black Spruce
North West Terrorities
Name:
The Northwest Territories were known as the North-Western Territory before 1870. Obviously the name refers to the location
Flag:
The flag of the Northwest Territories was adopted in 1969. It is white with blue at both ends and the provincial coat of arms in the centre
Coat of Arms:
The coat of arms of the Northwest Territories was adopted in 1957. The wavy blue line symbolizes the Northwest Passage, the gold bars symbolize the territory's mineral wealth, and the white fox represents the fur industry. Two narwhals guard a compass rose, which symbolizes the magnetic north
Capital city: Yellowknife Joined confederation: 15 July, 1870 Official motto: None Area: 1,346,106 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 13.48 percent Population: 37,360 people Population density: 0.0 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 0.12 percent Official flower: Mountain Avens Official bird: Gyrfalcon Official tree: Jack Pine
Nunavut
Name:
Nunavut is an Inuktitut word meaning Our Land
Flag:
This is the flag of Nunavut. The colours, blue and gold, symbolize the riches of the land, sea and sky. Red is a reference to Canada. The inuksuk symbolizes stone monuments, which guide people on the land and mark sacred and other special places. The star is the North Star and the traditional guide for navigation. The North Star is also symbolic of the leadership of elders in the community
Coat of Arms:
This is Nunavut's coat of arms. The colours blue and gold symbolize the riches of the land, sea and sky. In the base of the shield, the inuksuk symbolizes the stone monuments, which guide the people on the land and mark sacred and other special places. The qulliq, or Inuit stone lamp, represents light and the warm of family and the community. The concave arc of the five gold circles refers to the life-giving properties of the sun arching above and below the horizon. The star is the North Star, which is the traditional guide for navigation. In the crest, the igloo represents the traditional life of the people and the means of survival. The Royal Crown symbolizes public government for all people of Nunavut and establishes Nunavut as a partner in Confederation. The caribou and narwhal refer to land and sea animals, which are part of the natural heritage of Nunavut. The base of the crest is composed of land and sea, and features three species of Arctic wild flowers
Capital city: Iqaluit Joined confederation: 1 April, 1999 Official motto: Nunavut Sanginivut - Nunavut, our strength Area: 2,093,190 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 20.96 percent Population: 26,745 people Population density: 0.0 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 0.09 percent Official flower: Purple Saxifrage Official bird: Ptarmigan Official tree: None
Ontario
Name:
Ontario is of indian origin. In Huron the word onitari means lake and io means beautiful. In Iroquoian Kanadario means sparkling water. The word Ontario appeared in 1641 to describe lands along the Eastern Great Lakes and the name was applied to the province in 1867
Flag:
The flag of Ontario was adopted in 1965. It has a red background with the Union jack in the top left corner and the provincial coat of arms on the right side
Coat of Arms:
Ontario's coat of arms has a moose and a deer supporting a shield. On the shield is the cross of Saint George, representing England; and three maple leaves, representing Canada. The crest is a bear atop a wreath of green and gold
Capital city: Toronto Joined confederation: 1 July, 1867 Official motto: Ut Incepit Fidelis Sic Permanent - Loyal She Began, Loyal She Remains Area: 1,076,395 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 10.78 percent Population: 11,410,046 people Population density: 12.6 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 38.02 percent Official flower: White Trillium Official bird: Common Loon Official tree: Eastern White Pine
Prince Edward Island
Name:
Prince Edward Island was named in 1799 after the son of King George III, Prince Edward, the commander-in-chief of British North America at the time
Flag:
The flag of Prince Edward Island was adopted in 1964. It is an adaptation of the province's coat of arms
Coat of Arms:
The coat of arms of Prince Edward Island was adopted in 1905. The British lion symbolizes the province's ties with Britain. Three oak saplings symbolize the three counties of Prince Edward Island and one large oak tree stands for Canada and Britain
Capital city: Charlottetown Joined confederation: 1 July, 1873 Official motto: Parva Sub Ingenti - The Small Under the Protection of the Great Area: 5,660 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 0.06 percent Population: 135,294 people Population density: 23.8 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 0.45 percent Official flower: Lady's Slipper Official bird: Blue Jay Official tree: Northern Red Oak
Quebec
Name:
The name Quebec is derived from an Algonquin word for narrow passage. It originally referred to the narrowing of the St. Lawrence River near what is now Quebec City. The British named the newly captured colony Quebec in 1763
Flag:
The flag of Quebec was adopted in 1948. It is blue with a white cross and four fleurs-de-lis
Coat of Arms:
Quebec's coat of arms was adopted in 1939. It combines the symbols of France, Britain, and Canada. The three fleurs-de-lis for the French kings, the lion for Britain, and the maple leaves for Canada
Capital city: Quebec City Joined confederation: 1 July, 1867 Official motto: Je Me Souviens - I Remember Area: 1,542,056 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 15.44 percent Population: 7,237,479 people Population density: 5.3 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 24.11 percent Official flower: White Garden Lily Official bird: Snowy Owl Official tree: Yellow Birch
Saskatchewan
Name:
Saskatchewan gets its name from the Cree name for the Saskatchewan River, Kisiskatchewanisipi, meaning swift-flowing river. The name was eventually shortened to Saskatchewan and, in 1882, it became the name of one of the districts of the Northwest Territories
Flag:
The flag of Saskatchewan was adopted on March 31, 1969. The flag is divided horizontally into two equal parts, one green, and the other gold. The green represents the northern forested areas of the province and the gold symbolizes the southern grain field areas. The shield of arms of Saskatchewan is in the upper quarter near the staff, and the provincial floral emblem, the western red lily, is positioned on the fly half of the flag
Coat of Arms:
The coat of arms of Saskatchewan was granted by royal warrant of King Edward VII on 25 August, 1906. The crest, supporters, and motto were granted by royal warrant of Queen Elizabeth II on 16 September, 1986. The coat of arms displays a red lion, a traditional royal symbol, on a horizontal gold band across the upper third; three gold wheat sheaves on a green background, symbolizing Saskatchewan's agriculture and resources, occupy the lower two-thirds. The shield is supported by a royal lion and a white-tailed deer. Both supporters wear collars of prairie Indian beadwork, from which are suspended badges in the form of the six-pointed star of the Saskatchewan Order of Merit. The badge worn by the lion displays the maple leaf, that worn by the deer displays Saskatchewan's official flower. Immediately above the shield is a helmet facing left, representing the co-sovereign status of the province in Confederation. The helmet is decorated with mantling in Canada's national colours. Above the helmet is a wreath, which supports a beaver, representing the North, the fur trade, and the native people. The beaver holds a western red lily. The beaver is surmounted by the Crown, a symbol of Saskatchewan's direct link with the Sovereign through the Lieutenant Governor
Capital city: Regina Joined confederation: 1 September, 1905 Official motto: Multis E Gentibus Vires - From Many Peoples Strength Area: 651,036 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 6.52 percent Population: 978,933 people Population density: 1.7 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 3.26 percent Official flower: Western Red Lily Official bird: Sharp Tailed Grouse Official tree: Paper Birch
Yukon Terrority
Name:
The Yukon is named after the Yukon river, which flows through the territory
Flag:
The flag of the Yukon Territory was adopted in 1967. Its background is made up of three different colours, green on the left, white in the centre, and blue on the right. The territory's coat of arms is in the centre
Coat of Arms:
The Yukon's coat of arms was adopted in 1956. It contains the cross of Saint George of England. In the centre of the cross is a circle symbolizing the fur trade. The red triangles with gold circles symbolize the Yukon's mineral rich mountains. The wavy lines represent the Yukon's rivers and the malamute dog was an important part of the territory's history
Capital City:- Whitehorse
Capital city: Whitehorse Joined confederation: 13 June, 1898 Official motto: None Area: 482,443 square kilometres Percent of Canada's area: 4.83 percent Population: 28,674 people Population density: 0.1 people per square kilometre Percent of Canada's population: 0.09 percent Official flower: Fireweed Official bird: Common Raven Official tree: Quaking Aspen
--------------------
MADE IN CANADA- FEDERAL GOVERNMENT 2003
Our home is the native's land
We pay whatever, our gov-ern-ment demands
We pay whatever, our gov-ern-ment demands
-This Information is Courtesy of canada.com
The Senate meets on average for 100 days a year. Senators are allowed to miss 21 days without losing any salary.
Research Grants $30,000.00 per year. Office Budget $20,000.00 per year. Tax Free Expense Allowance $10,100.00
Free business class flights for Senators and their families, as many as 52 return-trip flights a year. Free telephone calls and faxes, and also free postage, at home as well as office. Free gym privileges, private equipment and instructors, subsidized haircuts, dry cleaning, furniture and limousine rides.
Imagine working for a company that has a little more than 300 employees and has the following statistics:
30 have been accused of spousal abuse
9 have been arrested for fraud
14 have been accused of writing bad cheques
95 have directly or indirectly bankrupted businesses
4 have done time for assault
55 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
12 have been arrested on drug related charges
4 have been arrested for shoplifting
16 are currently defendants in lawsuits
62 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year
-Can you guess which organization this is?
-It is the 301 MP's in the Canadian Parliament. The same group that cranks out hundred of new laws designed to keep the rest of us in line.
-This Information is Courtesy of The Ottawa Citizen
The Federal Government wasted $853,000.00 over 3 years on motel rooms for the homeless, and they were never even used.
-As seen on: CITY TV News
It's now official the citizens of Canada's largest province will soon have a historic and unprecedented opportunity to overhaul their province's political system by changing the way elections are run. On Monday, March 27, the Government of Ontario made the long-awaited announcement confirming the formation of an Ontario Citizens Assembly on Electoral Reform (OCA).
This Information is Courtesy of Fair Vote Canada
Hydro One chief and CEO Tom Parkinson was paid a salary of $780,000, a bonus of $702,000 and other compensation of $129,630 for a total of $1.6-million in 2005. Amidst a spending scandal he had to quit, but will walk away with at least $3-million in severance pay.
This Information is Courtesy of The Globe and Mail
Miscellaneous Trivia
In Canada, if a debt is higher than 25 cents, it is illegal to pay it with pennies.
"O Canada" was proclaimed Canada's national anthem on July 1, 1980, 100 years after it was first sung on June 24, 1880.
Canadian bacon is made the rib-eye of the pork loin.
There are no skunks in Newfoundland
The name Canada dates back to the year 1535. It was used by two American Indians who were traveling with Jacques Cartier to describe Stadacona -- which is now known as Quebec City. Actually, the word they used was "Kanata", which is the Huron-Iroquois word for "village" or "settlement", and Cartier simply repeated the word as Canada. The name stuck.
The world's smallest jail is believed to be in Rodney, Ontario, Canada. It is only 24.3 square meters (about 270 square feet)
------------------
Funny Canadian Jokes
Dear God
A little boy wanted $100.00
very badly and prayed for
weeks, but nothing happened.
Then he decided to write God a
letter requesting the $100.00.
When the postal authorities received
the letter to God , CANADA, they
decided to send it to the Prime Minister
The Prime Minister was so amused
that he instructed his secretary to
send the little boy a $5.00 bill.
The Prime Minister thought this would
appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the
$5.00 bill and sat down to write a
thank-you note to God, which read:
Dear God: Thank you very much for
sending the money. However, I noticed
that for some reason you sent it through
OTTAWA, CAN and those assholes
deducted $95.00 in taxes.
------------------
AND... A CANADIAN SMILE
And then God created Canada....
Finally a joke that explains what it's like to be Canadian...
Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him, resting on the seventh day.
He inquired of God, "Where have you been?"
God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I've made."
Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."
"Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth,
"For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."
The Archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to a large land mass in the top corner and asked, "What's that one?" "Ah," said God. "That's Canada, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful mountains, lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coastline. The people from Canada are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found traveling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hardworking and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. I'm also going to give them super-human, undefeatable ice hockey players who will be admired and feared by all who come across them." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed;
"What about balance, God? You said there would be BALANCE!"
God replied wisely, "Wait until you see who I'm putting next to them...."
------------------------
A Canadian Journal
Date: Sun, 3 Nov
Ah,yes... O Canada, Our home and native land!
Dear Diary
Aug. 12 - Moved to our new home in Canada. I am so excited. It's so beautiful here. The mountains are so majestic. Can hardly wait to see them with snow covering them.
Oct. 14 - Canada -- it is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves have turned all colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through the beautiful countryside and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful animals on earth. This must be paradise. I love it here!
Nov. 11 - Remembrance Day. Deer season starts soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous creature. Hope it snows soon. I love it here!
Dec. 2 - It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed with white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight (I won). When the snow plough came by we had to shovel the driveway again. What a beautiful place. I love Canada!
Dec. 12 - More snow last night. The snow plough did his trick again to the driveway. I love it here.
Dec. 19 - More snow last night. Couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work. It's beautiful here but I'm exhausted from shoveling. F#cking snow plough.
Dec. 22 - More of that white shit fell last night. I've got blisters on my hands and a sore back from shoveling. I think the snow plough hides around the corner until I'm done shoveling the driveway. Asshole.
Dec. 25 - Merry F#cking Christmas! More frigging snow. If I ever get my hands on the sonovabitch who drives the snow plough, I swear I'll kill the bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt the f#cking ice.
Dec. 27 - More white shit last night. Been inside for three days now except for shoveling out the driveway after that snow plough goes through every time. Can't go anywhere, the car's stuck in a mountain of white crap and it is so frigging cold. The weatherman says to expect another 10 inches of the crap again tonight. Do you know how many shovels full of snow 10 inches is?
Dec. 28 - That f#cking weatherman was wrong. We got 34 inches of the crap this time. At this rate it won't melt before summer. The snow plough got stuck up in the road and that bastard came to my door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him that I had already
broken six shovels shoveling out all the crap he had pushed into my driveway, I damn near broke my last one over his f#cking head.
Jan. 4 - Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food and on my way back a damned deer ran in front of the car. Did about $3,000 damage to the car. Those beasts should be killed. The bastards are everywhere. Wish the hunters had
exterminated them all last November.
May 3 - Took the car to the garage in town. Would you believe the thing is rusted out from all that salt they put all over the roads.
May 10 - Moved to Florida. I can't imagine why anyone in their right mind would ever want to live in such a God forsaken place as Canada!
---------------
CANADA
(Jeff Foxworthy and Larry The Cable Guy just had to help with this one....)
Things a Southerner would never say.... (or a Canadian- except for the firearms)
We don't keep firearms in this house.
Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?
You can't feed that to the dog.
I thought Graceland was tacky.
No kids in the back of the pick-up, it's not safe.
Wreslin's fake.
Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
We're vegetarians.
Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken. Do you think my hair is too big?
I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.
Honey, these bonsai trees need watering?
Who's Richard Petty?
Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
Deer heads detract from the decor.
Spitting is such a nasty habit.
I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
Trim the fat off that steak.
Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
The tires on that truck are too big.
I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad.
Duct tape won't fix that.
I've got it all on a floppy disk.
Unsweetened tea tastes better.
Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
My fiancée, Paula Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
Checkmate.
She's too old to be wearing that bikini.
Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?
Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
I don't have a favorite college team.
I believe you cooked those green beans too long.
Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.
Elvis who?
Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
--------------------
Canadian Tourism Humour
The most unusual questions tourists have asked at information bureaus across the country.
**From Tourism Toronto, a toll free info and reservations line
How do I apply for the Canadian Express Card?
What's this Boxing Day in Toronto, do you box on that day?
I heard about that new law and I'd like to find out... uh, my girlfriend would like to know the best places to go topless in Toronto.
Caller: How far is Boston from Toronto?
Counselor: About 900 kilometers, or 565 miles.
Caller: So if I drive using miles, it won't take me as long to get there? Is that what you're saying?
Can I take the subway to Vancouver?
Good afternoon, I'm entertaining some executives, and would like to know where they can ride llamas.
What information do you have on Italy?
**From Check-ln Nova Scotia, the province's toll-free information and reservations number
Are you connected to Greenland?
Can you tell me about the ferry from Halifax to Europe?
Does Nova Scotia have a dress code?
** From Alberta's Banff/Lake Louise tourist bureau
Visitor: How far is it to Lake Louise?
Staff member: 40 miles
Visitor: How long is the trail?
Staff member: Five kilometers.
Visitor: What's that in English?
At which elevation do the elk change to moose?
Can you book us baseball tickets at the SkyDome tonight? We're driving to Toronto this afternoon.
** From the information kiosk at Niagara Falls, Ontario
What time do you turn on the rainbow?
Are the CN Tower and SkyDome within walking distance?
From a tourist who was admiring the falls at night, when they're lit up with various colored lights: What kind of dye do they put in the water to make it change color like that?
How can I parachute over the falls?
I have to be at this address in Vancouver for dinner at 5 o'clock this evening. How much time should I allow myself to drive there?
Why do you Canadians have fireworks tonight? The 4th of July is still a few days away.
Which way do we walk to get to Montreal? We'd like to go there for lunch.
--------------------------
This Land Is Our Land
Funny Canadian Jokes
A True Canadian
It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No," says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible", said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for final game of the Stanley Cup playoffs and not use it?" The neighbor says "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven't been to together since we got married in 1967." "Oh ... I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head "No, they're all at the funeral."
Canada language
How you can spot a Canadian, eh? -Don McGillivray (Ottawa columnist for Southam Newspapers)
How do you tell a Canadian from an American?
It used to be enough to ask him to say the alphabet. When the Canadian got to the end, he'd say "zed" instead of "zee". But 18 years of Sesame Street have taught a lot of Canadian kids to say "zee," and it's starting to sound as natural as it does south of the 49th parallel.
Another test used to be the word "lieutenant". Canadians pronounced it in the British was, "leftenant", while Americans say "lootenant". But American cop shows and army shows and movies have eroded that difference, too.
Canadians have been adopting American spelling as well. They used to put a "u" in words like labour. The main organization in the country, the equivalent of the AFL-CIO, is still officially called the Canadian Labour Congress. But news organizations have been wiping out that distinction by adopting American spelling, mostly to make it easier to use news copy from such agencies as Associated Press without a lot of changes. So it's "Canadian Labor Congress" when the Canadian Press, the national news agency, writes about it.
Some pronunciations, considered true tests of Canadians, are not as reliable as they're thought. Take the word "house" for example. When some Canadians say it, it sounds very Scottish in American ears. Visiting Americans trying to reproduce what they hear usually give the Canadian pronunciation as "hoose".
The same for "out" and "about". The way some Canadians say them sounds like "oot" and "aboot" to many Americans. And when an American says "house" to a Canadian, the Canadian often hears a bit of an "ay" in it, something like "hayouse".
But pronunctiaiton isn't a good test because people from different parts of Canada speak differently. A resident of the Western province of Alberta, where there has been a considerable inflow of settlers from the United States, may sound like a Montanan or a Dakotan.
Then there's the ubiquitous Canadian expression "eh?" - pronounced "ay?" This is a better test because many Canadians tack it on to the end of every assertion to turn it into a question
---------------------------
JOKES ABOUT MIXED COUNTRIES- HEAVEN AND HELL
HEAVEN AND HELL
Hell is a place where ...
all the police are German;
the British are the chefs;
the Norwegians are the singers;
the French are in charge of organization;
the Australians are the lovers;
the Swiss run the navy;
the Americans are the brewers;
the Belgians put up the signposts;
all the comedians are Swedish;
the South Africans are in charge of racial integration;
the only logic is Irish;
the speech therapists are Scottish;
the Ethiopians are in charge of agricultural policy;
the Italians run the armed forces;
the Indians are in charge of birth control;
the tour companies are run by Icelanders;
all the economists are Brazilian;
the Serbs are in charge of human rights;
the Spanish are the road builders;
all the orphanages are run by Romanians;
...and the common language is Dutch;
Heaven is a place where ...
the Germans are in charge of the organization;
all the police are British;
all the environmentalists are Norwegian;
the French are the chefs;
the Swiss are the bankers;
all the salesmen are American;
the Belgians make the chocolate;
the Swedes are the lovers;
the goldmines are run by South Africans;
all the storytellers are Irish;
all the distillers are Scottish;
the opera singers are Italian;
the Danes are the brewers;
all the spices are provided by Indians;
the fishermen are Icelandic;
all the footballers are Brazilian;
the Spanish run the holiday resorts;
and the Dutch are the merchants.
AND... MORE.... CULTURAL STUFF
Joe Smith starts the day early, having set his alarm clock (made in China), for 600 A.M.
While his coffee pot (made in China) is perking, he puts his blow dryer (made in Taiwan) to work and shaves with his electric razor (made in China).
He puts on a dress shirt (made in Taiwan), his designer jeans (made in Singapore), and a pair of tennis shoes (made in Korea).
After cooking up some breakfast in his new electric skillet (made in Philippines), he sits down to figure out on his calculator (made in Mexico), how much he can spend today.
After setting his watch (made in Switzerland) to the radio (made in China), he goes out, gets in his car (made in Germany) and goes looking - as he has been for months - for a good paying American job.
At the end of another discouraging and fruitless day, Joe decides to relax for a while.
He puts on a pair of sandals (made in China), pours himself a glass of wine (made in France), and turns on his TV (made in Japan)...
... and ponders again why he can't find a good paying North American job.
-----------------
A) The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
(B) On the other hand, the French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
(C) The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
(D) The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans
(E) Conclusion: Eat & drink what you like. It's speaking English that kills you.
---------------------------
CANADA- WHAT WE WANTED IN EUROPE -
This is what we wanted in Europe:
Swiss salary.
Luxembourg taxes.
German car.
British home.
Spanish girls.
French wine.
Italian food.
Belgian beer.
Austrian mountains.
Danish administration.
And this was the EC's proposal for a Europe after EMU:
Czech salary.
Swedish taxes.
Spanish car.
Belgian home.
Greek girls.
German wine.
British food.
French beer.
Dutch mountains.
Italian administration.
Apparently, when we joined the EMU, the term 'spending a penny' was replaced by 'euronating'.
--------------------------------------
PLAY ON COUNTRIES
Waitress: Hawaii, Mister? You must be Hungary.
Gent: Yes, Siam. And I can't Rumania long, either. Venice lunch ready?
Waitress: I'll Russia table. What are you Ghana Havre? Aix?
Gent: You want Tibet? I prefer Turkey. Can Jamaica cook step on the Gaza bit?
Waitress: Odessa laugh! Alaska, but listen for her Wales.
Gent: I'm not Balkan. Just put a Cuba sugar in my Java.
Waitress: Don't you be Sicily, big boy. Sweden it yourself. I'm only here to Serbia.
Gent: Denmark my check and call the Bosphorus, Egypt me. There's an Eire. I hope he'll Kenya. I don't Bolivia know who I am!
Waitress: Canada noise! I don't Caribbean. You sure Ararat!
Gent: Samoa your wisecracks? What's got India? D'you think this arguing Alps business? Why be so Chile? Be Nice!
Waitress: Don't Kiev me that Boulogne! Alemain do! Spain in the neck. Pay your Czech and don't Kuwait. Ayssinia!
Gent (to himself): I'll come back with my France and Taiwan on Zanzibar is open.
----------------------------------
THE TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING FRENCH :
1. When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay.
2. Experience the cynicism of winning the world cup for the first time.
3. You get to eat gourmet food like horse, snails and frog's legs.
4. If there's a war you can surrender really early.
5. You don't have to read the subtitles on those late night films on Channel 4.
6. You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people's countries.
7. You can be ugly and still become a famous film star.
8. Allowing Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating your sense of national pride doesn't faze you.
9. You don't have to bother with toilets, just poop in the street.
10. People think you're a great lover even when you're not.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN :
1. You can have a woman president without electing her.
2. You can spell color wrong and get away with it.
3. You can call Budweiser beer.
4. You can be a crook and still be president.
5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
6. If you can breathe you can get a gun.
7. You can invent a new public holiday every year.
8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care.
9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy".
10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth. When you're not at all.
TOP 12 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH :
1. Glorious history of killing North American tribes.
2. Two World Wars and One World Cup doo-dah doo-dah.
3. Warm beer.
4. Punctuality.
5. You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket.
6. You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events.
7. Union jack underpants.
8. You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.
9. Bathing once a week-whether you need to or not.
10. Ditto changing underwear.
11. Beats being Welsh.
12. Or Scottish.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN :
1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes.
2. Unembarrassed to wear fur.
3. No need to worry about tax returns.
4. Glorious military history... well, till about 400 A.D.
5. Can wear sunglasses inside.
6. Political stability.
7. Flexible working hours.
8. Live near the Pope.
9. World's greatest Motorcycles.
10. World's greatest Cars.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SPANISH :
1. Glorious history of killing South American tribes.
2. The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees.
3. You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, Brits etc.
4. The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans.
5. Everybody else makes crap paella and claims it's the real thing.
6. Honesty.
7. Only sure way of bedding a woman is to dress up in stupid, tight clothes and risk your life in front of bulls.
8. You get to eat bulls' testicles.
9. Gibraltar.
10. Supported Argentina in Falklands War.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN :
1. Oktoberfest.
2. Wonderful sense of humour.
3. Oktoberfest.
4. World's largest manufacturer of beach towels.
5. Oktoberfest.
6. Sausages.
7. Oktoberfest.
8. Oktoberfest.
9. Oktoberfest.
10. Innate pacifism.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING MEXICAN :
1. Nachos.
2. Tacos.
3. Burritos.
4. Fajitas.
5. Quesadillas.
6. Tamales.
7. Chimichangas.
8. Rellenos.
9. Flautas.
10. Corona.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING WELSH:
1. You've got to be kidding, right?!?!?!?
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING IRISH :
1. Guinness.
2. Free labour - 18 children because you can't use contraceptives.
3. You can get into a fight just by marching down someone's road.
4. Pubs never close.
5. Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in the second Vatican Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can't have sex with a condom on.
6. No one can ever remember (or remind you of) the night before.
7. Stew (made with Guinness).
8. More Guinness.
9. Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the morning after a bout of sectarian violence.
10. Guinness
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING CANADIAN :
1. It beats being an American.
2. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
3. You can play ice hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
4. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
5. Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
6. A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise.
7. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
8. Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins.
9. Own-an-Eskimo scheme.
10. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRALIAN:
1. Know your great-grand-dad was a thieving bastard that no civilized nation on earth wanted.
2. Fosters Lager.
3. Dispossess Aborigines who have lived in your country for 40,000 years because you think it belongs to you.
4. Annihilate England every time you play them at cricket.
5. Tact and sensitivity.
6. Bondi Beach.
7. Other beaches.
8. Liberated attitude to homosexuals (politicians only?)
9. Drinking cold lager on the beach.
10. Having a bit of a swim and then drink some cold lager on the beach.
-------------------------
One for our Amercian friends.. called Now U know
A Washington, DC, airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information. Then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response: click.
3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!"(OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map." (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time." (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am.I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!"
After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it (I was laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.
8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California, and then take the train to Hawaii?"
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them."
10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever, smarty!"
11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!"
12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal."
Now you know why the Government is in the shape that it's in!
--------------------------
CANADA: 4 CATS
This is for Joyce and all my friends who have cats:
"Managing senior programmers is like herding cats." --Dave Platt
"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." --Anonymous
"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this." --Anonymous
"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow." --Jeff Valdez
"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats." --English proverb
"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat." --Ellen Perry Berkeley
"One cat just leads to another." --Ernest Hemingway
"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later." --Mary Bly
"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia." --Joseph Wood Krutch
"People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life." --Faith Resnick
"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." --Anonymous
"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior." --Hippolyte Taine
"No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me." --Unknown
"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." --Albert Schweitzer
"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart." --Ernest Menaul
"Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God." --Anonymous
"Time spent with cats is never wasted." --Colette
"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well." --Missy Dizick
"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats." --Colonial American proverb
"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want." --Joseph Wood Krutch
"I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic." --Anonymous
"My husband said it was him or the cat... I miss him sometimes." --Anonymous
"Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit." --Anonymous
---------------------
CANADA - DOGS
No Pets Allowed (this is for Billy C. and Scotty Emerick- and his Dog song)
Two buddies were out for a Saturday stroll. One had a Doberman and the other had a chihuahua. As they sauntered down the street, the guy with the Doberman said to his friend, "Let's go over to that bar and get something to drink."
The guy with the Chihuahua said, "We can't go in there. We've got dogs with us."
The one with the Doberman said, "Just follow my lead." They walked over to the bar and the guy with the Doberman put on a pair of dark glasses and started to walk into the bar.
The bouncer at the door said, "Sorry, Mac, no pets allowed."
The man with the Doberman said, "You don't understand. This is my Seeing-Eye dog."
The bouncer said, "A Doberman pinscher?"
The man said, "Yes, they're using them now. They're very good."
The bouncer said, "OK then, come on in."
The buddy with the Chihuahua figured he'd try it too so he put on a pair of dark glasses and started to walk into the bar. He knew his story would be a bit more unbelievable. Once again the bouncer said, "Sorry, pal, no pets allowed."
The man with the Chihuahua said, "You don't understand. This is my Seeing-Eye dog."
The bouncer said, "A Chihuahua?"
The man with the Chihuahua said, "A Chihuahua?!? A Chihuahua?!? They gave me a darn Chihuahua??
-----------------
CANADA- ON FAITH
Jesus is Watching You
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say: "Jesus is watching you!"
Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. "Jesus is watching you," the voice boomed again.
The burglar stopped dead again. He was frightened. Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot.
He asked the parrot: "Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?" "Yes", said the parrot.
The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then he asked the parrot: "What's your name?"
"Clarence," said the bird.
"That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burglar. "What idiot named you Clarence?"
The parrot said, "The same idiot who named the Rottweiller Jesus."
----------------------
An atheist professor was teaching a college class and he told the class that he was going to prove that there was not a God.
He said, "God if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"
Ten minutes went by. He kept taunting God, saying, "Here I am God, I'm still waiting"
He got down to the last couple of minutes and a Huge 250-pound rugby player happened to walk by the door and heard what the professor said.
The rugby player walked into the classroom and in the last minute, he walked up, hit the professor full force, and sent him flying off the platform.
The professor got up, obviously shaken and said, "Where did you come from, and why did you do that?"
The football player replied, "God was busy; He sent me!"
-------------------------
WILL ROGERS QUOTES:
Make crime pay - become a lawyer.
Every time a woman leaves off something she looks better, but every time a man leaves off something he looks worse.
The taxpayers are sending congressmen on expensive trips abroad. It might be worth it except they keep coming back!
Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the martest race of people on Earth.
You can't say civilization isn't advancing; in every war they kill you in a new way.
People are getting smarter nowadays; they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide.
I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.
Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
-------------------------
ERMA BOMBECK QUOTES:
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/2/1101.htmI come from family where gravy is considered a beverage.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/743.htmWhen humor goes, there goes civilization.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/701.htmA grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/435.htmMarriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/392.htmI have a theory about the human mind. A brain is a lot like a computer. It will only take so many facts, and then it will go into overload and blow up.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/391.htmShopping is a woman thing. It's a contact sport like football. Women enjoy the scrimmage, the noisy crowds, the danger of being trampled to death, and the ecstasy of the purchase.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/390.htmIf a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
---------------------------
STEVE MARTIN QUOTES
I saw the movie, 'Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon' and I was surprised because I didn't see any tigers or dragons. And then I realised why: they're crouching and hidden.
A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair.
There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn't stand for that.
Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
[Introducing the best adapted screenplay]
I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.
-- (at the 2003 Oscars®)
What is a movie star? A movie star is many things. They can be tall, short, thin, or skinny. They can be democrats...or skinny.
-- (at the 2003 Oscars®)
How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars.
Boy, those French, they have a different word for everything!
First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn't stand for that.
----------------------------
GEORGE BURNS QUOTES:
When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my fifties I was considered eccentric. Here I am doing and saying the same things I did then and I'm labeled senile.
-- (Just you and me Kid, 1979)
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/2/1465.htmActually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/2/1329.htmRetirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty five I still had pimples.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/882.htmWhen I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/565.htmActually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/269.htmEverything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/189.htmToo bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/188.htmI can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/187.htmIt's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
http://tafmaster.com/taf/2328/249184/?referrer_url=http://www.amusingquotes.com/h/1/186.htmYou've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.
--------------------------
BILL COSBY QUOTES:
Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap on-a-rope.
A word to the wise ain't necessary -- it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
When you become senile, you won't know it.
--------------------------------------------
(am very proud of my father's Newfoundland heritage... my father's family came to Newfoundland as fishers from France in 1632 to Lawn, Placentia Bay, NFLD.)
I IS A NEWFOUNDLANDER!
Hey
I'm not on pogey,
and I'm not married to my sister.
I don't eat cod fish tree touimesh a day,
well dat's cuz dere ain't no more cod fish left.
I don't own a boat or a sowester,
but I can see a boat from me window.
I don't drink screech,
at least before noon on a weekday anywaysh.
I don't know Gordon Pincent, or Mary Walsh, or Jimmy Flynn, or Rick Mercer,
but I watch Dis Hour Has 22 Minutes every week eh.
I got a premer named Brian Tobin,
he went to war with Spain over sumin called a turbet,
Ain't sure what a turbet acshly,
but I'm damned if I'm gonna let any goy frum Spain come and take dem away frum me.
I ain't the boy that builds da boats,
and I ain't de boy that sails em,
but like I said before I can see a boat from ma window eh.
I don't dance a jig everytime I hear Celtic music,
but I'll do dat Karaokee ting if I got enough Black Forest Beers in me.
I'm still pissed off at Prince Edward Oilasnd,
for buildin at dere bridge and not buildin one out to the rock them stupid spud heads.
And even though he ain't really a Newfie,
I think Stompin Tom Conors should run for Proime Minister.
Newfoundland is the oldest settlement in Nort America,
and the youngest province in confederation,
Oh my grandfudder's still pissed off about dat one,
you don't even wanna talk about Joey Smallwood to grampa.
And even though I lives in fort McMurray,
Lord tunderin Jeshus,
I still tinks that Newfoundland is the best darn province in the cuntry.
My name is Buddy,
and I is a Newfoundlander.
The Canadian Way to Stay Cool In Summer- Creative Canadians Combat Climate Change
Contrary to popular myths and legends, in Canada there are a few weeks of the year when the sun nears the solstice, the permafrost melts, the heat rises, and the miracle of summer occurs. When Canadians experience this sensation of warmth, they often retreat to locations where they are back in their own element (hockey rinks, ice hotels, Costco freezers). But after Canadians overcome the fear of summer, they, like other civilized societies must find ways to combat the heat, however rare the circumstance.
While many are content to turn up the air conditioning or head to cooler climates (Iqaluit, Alert Bay, Superman's Fortress Of Solitude), other resourceful Canadians do their best to adapt to the heat while maintaining comfort and control of their environment.
Swimming Pools
Swimming pools require a lot of work to maintain, they have a short season, and they're expensive to operate. None of these factors makes owning a swimming pool even remotely worthwhile. Friends with pools are usually pretentious and boring and will force you to drink wine coolers, and public pools are so full of chlorine that it can turn a well-tanned woman into an albino in less than an hour. Instead, Canadians prefer their watersports with water balloons, water sprinklers, and combat squirt weapons filled with ice water.
Beergaritas
A beergarita is a beer that has started to freeze and has that semi-frozen ice slush throughout the bottle. Typically this is achieved when you place warm beer in your freezer to cool it off, but you leave it in just a little bit too long. Now, if the beer isn't too frozen, you can pour the slushy beer into a margarita glass (straw optional) and fight the heat with your fancy new beer drink.
Kiddies Pools
Kiddies pools, unlike swimming pools are a great source of enjoyment and fun, and sometimes the kids are allowed to use them as well. Now it doesn't make sense to fill a kiddie play pool with beer, but if you keep them in the bottles, half-fill the pool with cold water, and throw in a couple of bags of ice, you will have a nice place to keep the beer cold, and also provide you with a way to cool off your tootsies (those would be your toes). Advanced drinkers can also play a refreshing game of beer bobbing, a challenging activity where one submerges his head in the water to retrieve a beer with his teeth. This game, which requires great tolerance to the cold (a cinch for Canadians), often causes brain-freeze, which usually occurs when you eat ice cream (or beergaritas) too fast.
Passive Activities
Nothing will help you keep cooler than doing nothing. While being athletic and active might be good for your health, it's not going to keep you cool, unless you're going to Stick & Puck at the local arena. Instead, stay indoors, preferably in a basement, and watch movies, sports, and infomercials on must-have cooking gadgets. If you watch cool Wintery movies like Ice Age, The Polar Express, or even It's A Wonderful Life, you'll get the impression that it's much colder than it really is, which will help trick you into feeling cooler.
While Canadians may not be entirely acclimatized to the season of Summer, at least there are ways to combat the intrusive heat--even if it's only hot for a few weeks out of the year.
-------------------------
OF COURSE ALL CANADIANS KNOW EACH OTHER
A Canadian Never Forgets A Face
The boom-town country of Canada, stretching 9306 kilometres long, 4634 km wide, and a few kilometers deep, is home to 34 million people. And with the exception of a few landed immigrants, a couple dozen refugees, and a handful of not-so-permanent residents, they all know each other.
This boastful claim of memory retention isn't due to the fact that Canadians are naturally nosy people. While that is partially true, the consistently harsh Northern climate has created certain social necessities. It means that during the next raging blizzard, you might need to ask for an ice-saw or sled dog, and it's easier to borrow from friends than strangers. And when your snowmobile needs a jumpstart, it's comforting to know that the next person who sees you on the side of the snow-covered highway is an acquaintance.
Did you know that because of this Darwinian need for self-preservation, over the centuries Canadians have developed the inherent ability to remember everyone they've ever met? Whether it’s an introduction at a moose barbecue in Moose Jaw, a beaver roast in Bella Coola, or a caribou cookout in Cape Breton, Canadians will always remember a name, a face, and sometimes even an address if it doesn't have too many nines in it.
And when there are no formal introductions, names of family, friends, and acquaintances are passed down by Canadian wisewomen during informal evening ceremonies. Once committed to memory, a Canadian always knows that there is another brother or sister that they can count on to help them in a time of need.
Whether you need a flat tire repaired, a ride home from the pub, or a spare goalie in a beer league hockey match, strong traditions allow Canadians to develop closer bonds than the people from Greece, Lithuania, Upper Volta, Lower Volta, or any Volta in between.
This amazing gift for recollection most notably emerges when traveling Canadians visit foreign countries, like the United States of America. When an American meets another Canuck (what a coincidence that would be!) it only makes sense for the Yank to ask if they know the other Canadian they met two years ago on a golf course in Palm Springs. (note: Many Americans have met Canadians in person, know someone else who has, or at least read about them from the storybooks.)
You'd be forgiven if you thought it to be a mathematical impossibility to identify, let alone remember, one person in 34 million, but yes, Canadians do really know everyone in their own country!
"Why, of course I know Pete from Edmonton," a Canadian would respond when asked by a complete American stranger in Florida. "We’re good friends; we stay in touch. I met him on Polar Hunt Day back in 1995. Say, do you know any other Canadians? How about Rick from Toronto? Or Wayne from Hamilton? Oh, what about Dave in Vancouver--We went to school together.
----------------------------
Canada
Emergency Beer Kits Save Lives And Parties
Canadians Are Prepared For Any Drinking Emergency
It's a well-known fact that thirsty Canadian drinkers prefer to keep their fridges stocked with copious qualities of cold beer, often dedicating a second refrigerator for this specific purpose. But there are critical times when the beer runs out (usually as the result of an extended sporting event), and a stranded Canadian can't get to the liquor store, cold beer and wine store, or neighbourhood booze can to pick up an extra few dozen Molsons for his close friends (translate: mooching guests). Even properly equipped with a functional snowmobile, ice shoes, and other extreme-weather protection, the helpless Canadian can't combat the chronological factors that don't permit the sale of alcohol after 11pm.
When this happens it is often necessary to use extreme measures--no, not wine coolers--to meet their desperate refreshment needs. Fortunately, most resourceful Canadians own emergency beer kits, brewery-approved supplies that allow them to prepare and serve a form of "substitute" beer during times of crisis and beer shortage (usually these two are same thing).
To date, emergency beer kits have been credited with saving hundreds of parties, barbeques, and playoff gatherings.
The essential elements of these beer kits usually consists of several packages of beer drink crystals (typically 5% alcohol), 2 to 4 litres of bottled water, a beer jug, and a few plastic cups. More sophisticated kits may be comprised of liquid beer extracts, 2 to 4 litres of bottled water, a beer jug with a popular beer brand logo, and a few plastic cups with sports trivia questions printed on the sides.
While they may not taste exactly the same as professionally brewed ales, lagers, and heffenweisseses, emergency beer kit beers can meet the essential requirements of Canadian beer drinkers. While slightly lacking in flavour, most Canadians agree that emergency beer kit beer is still better than white wine, flavoured rum drinks, or champagne cocktails.
It can be difficult to prepare for natural catastrophes, such as when your clumsy best friend accidentally drops the two-four of Labatt's on the porch of your remote country cabin, shattering every bottle in a heart-wrenching sound that echos across the mountains like like a death wail. But with an emergency beer kit or two stored away with your camping supplies, the trip (and your friend's life) doesn't have to end that day.
------------------------
CANADIAN SOLDIER
A Canadian soldier, serving in World War II, had just returned from several weeks of intense action on the German front lines. He had finally been granted R&R and had made it to Southampton, England, there to board a train bound for a few days in London. The train was very crowded, so the soldier walked the length of the train, looking for an empty seat. The only seat unoccupied was directly across from a well dressed middle aged lady and was being used by her little dog.
The war-weary soldier asked, "Please, ma'am, may I sit in that seat?"
The English woman looked down her nose at the soldier, sniffed and said, "You Canadians. You are such a rude class of people. Can't you see my little Fifi is using that seat?" The soldier walked away, determined to find a place to rest, but after another trip down to the end of the train, found himself again facing the woman with the dog in the opposite seat.
Again he asked, "Please, lady. May I sit there? I'm very tired."
The English woman wrinkled her nose and snorted, "You Canadians! Not only are you rude, you are also quite arrogant."
The soldier leaned against the swaying wall of the train and again asked if he might please sit down.
The lady said, "Not only are you Canadians rude and arrogant, you're also very inconsiderate."
The soldier didn't say anything else; he leaned over, picked up the little dog and tossed it out the window of the train and sat down in the empty seat.
While the woman shrieked and railed, demanding that someone defend her and chastise the soldier, an English gentleman sitting across the aisle spoke up, "You know, sir, you Canadians doseem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You eat holding the fork in the wrong hand. You drive your autos on the wrong side of the road. And now, sir, you've thrown the wrong bitch out the window."
-----------------------------
MOUNTIE MESSAGE
Two men are driving through Saskatchewan when they get pulled over by a Mountie.
The Mountie walks up to the car and taps on the window with his nightstick. The driver rolls down the window and "WHACK", the Mountie smacks him in the head with the stick.
The driver yells, "What the hell was that for?"
The Mountie says, "You're in Saskatchewan son. When we pull you over, you better have your license ready when we get to your car."
The quivering driver says, "I'm sorry, Officer, I'm not from around here."
The Mountie runs a check on the guys license, and he's clean. He gives the guy his license back and walks around to the passenger side and taps on the window.
The puzzled passenger rolls down the window and "WHACK", the Mountie smacks him with the nightstick too.
The passenger yells, "What'd you do that for?!"
The Mountie says, "Just making your wish come true."
The passenger says, "Huh?"
The Mountie says, "I know that two miles down the road you're gonna say, "I wish that asshole would've tried that shit with me."
-------------------
HOCKEY LESSONS
At one point during a hockey game, the coach called one of his 7-year-old hockey players aside and asked, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?"
The little boy nodded in the affirmative.
Then the coach asked, "Do you understand that what matters is not whether we win or lose, but how we play together as a team?"
The little boy nodded yes.
"So," the coach continued, "I’m sure you know, when a penalty is called, you shouldn’t argue, curse, attack the referee, or call him a pecker-head. Do you understand all that?"
Again the little boy nodded.
The coach went on. "And when I call you off the ice so that another boy gets a chance to play, it’s not good sportsmanship to call your coach ’a dumb asshole’, is it?’’
Again the little boy agreed.
"Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain all that to your mother..."
---------------------------
THE MEANING OF THE CANADIAN FLAG..
A Canadian couple was strolling through a park in London (England) and sat down on a bench next to an elderly Briton. The Brit noticed their lapel pins sporting the Canadian flag and, to make conversation, said "Judging by your pins, you must be Canadians".
"Indeed we are", replied the Canadian gentleman.
"I hope you won't mind my asking," said the Brit, "but what do the two red bars on your flag represent?"
"Well," replied the Canadian gentlman, "one of the bars stands for the courage and hardiness of our people in settling the cold expanses and broad prairies of our country. The other is for the honesty and integrity for which Canadians are known."
The Brit mulled this over and nodded. Having poor eyesight at his advanced age, and not being familiar with maple leaves, he then asked, "And what's that six-pointed item in the middle of your flag?"
"Oh, that's to remind us of the six words of our national motto," the Canadian lady piped up.
The Brit asked, "And what are those six words?"
The Canadian smiled and replied, "They are 'Don't blame us - we're not Americans.'"
-----------------------------------
CANADA- RELIGION
An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. For his first chapter he decided to write about American churches. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would work his way across the country from South to North.
On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read $10,000 per call". The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for. The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The American thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was. She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. "O.K., thank you," said the American. He then traveled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston, and New York. In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it.
The American, upon leaving Vermont saw a sign for Canada and decided to see if Canadians had the same phone. He arrived in OTTAWA, and again, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "10 cents per call." The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. "Father, I've traveled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in every state the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?"
The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Canada now son, it's a local call".
-----------------------
JUST FUN CANADA STUFF
Bear Canada.
OK, jokes like that aren’t going to get you on Leno or Letterman, but every would-be stand-up comic has to start somewhere, and in elementary classrooms some of these "cool Canadian jokes" could be killers. O’Connor’s jokes have been divided into eight sections. "Wild Canada!" (from which the excerpt was taken) contains 21 riddle-type jokes involving animals. "When Canadians Come a-Knockin’" consists of nine knock-knock jokes.
Who’s there?
Tuque.
Tuque who?
Tuque you by surprise, didn’t I
Fourteen sports-based jokes are found in "Jokes for Jocks."
Drain Gretzky!
"Those Crazy Canucks" contains 18 more riddle jokes with a Canadian focus.
They get a lot of ehs.
Canadian places provide the focus for another 14 riddle jokes in "From Sea to Silly Sea."
Banana of Green Gables!
A Canadianized version of the knucklehead jokes appears in the 17 jokes found in "Oh, You Canucklehead!" section.
Doctor: Then take the spoon out of the cup first!
Politicians bear the brunt of the half-dozen entries in "Capital Humour."
Someone who gives a hoot!
What is big and white and found in Vancouver?
A lost polar bear.
Why did the boy climb up a tree with his hockey stick?
Because he wanted to play with the Maple Leafs.
---------------------------
SIGNS THAT YOU MAY BE CANADIAN!
1. You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK".
2. You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine on the chesterfield."
3. You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
4. You drink Pop, not Soda.
5. You know that a Mickey and 2-4's mean, "party at the camp, eh!!!"
6. You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, not vacation, with good
cigars.
7. You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
8. You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
9. You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
10. You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.
11. You cried when you heard that "Mr. Dress Up" died recently.
12. You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
13. You brag to Americans that: Shania Twain, Jim Carey, Celine Dion, Matthew Perry and much more are Canadians.
14. You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!
15. You know what a toque is.
16. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
17. You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed."
18. You live in a house with no front step, but the door is one meter up from the ground.
19. Your local newspaper covers the national news on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
20. You know that the four seasons mean: winter, still winter, almost winter, and road work.
21. You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day.
22. You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
23. You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan."
24. You perk up when you hear the theme song from 'Hockey Night in Canada'.
25. You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
26. "Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite than, "Huh?"
27. You will not ever forget the Olympics 2002, when Canada won gold in both women's and men's hockey. NEVER!
28. You actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all of your Canadian friends!!!! and then you send them to your American friends just to confuse them...further.
How Does Wayne Gretzky stay cool?
He sits next to his fans.
-------------------------------
I love Kevin Costner and The Modern West...
When he was in Canada (remember Billy Currington was performing and Kevin and The Modern West were getting ready to go on stage when the big storm came up in Canada... and we lost a great person and many injured.... anyway Billy C. and Keving and TMW will be coming back...to our Canada in 2010- WITH BILLY C AND ALAN JACKSON)...
Kevin Costner Makes With the Sexy/Funny Jokes at the Canadian Open
Kevin Costner is a pretty annoying person, I tend to think. After all, he did bring Waterworld and the Postman into our lives, and those alone are worthy of eternal banishment from our country. Which, actually, may explain what he was doing playing golf in Canada at the recent Canadian Open. Or not -- either way, I'm personally revoking any ban that may be on Costner in the United States after seeing the following video: Costner is asked if he's ever had Mike Weir's wine before and then the hilarity kicks in.
and the video is so Costner... and very funny..
http://golf.fanhouse.com/2009/07/30/kevin-coster-makes-with-the-sexy-funny-jokes-at-the-canadian-ope/
-------------------------------------------------
Canada's First Nations
"First Nations people" refers to Status and Non-Status "Indian" peoples in Canada. Many communities also use the term "First Nation" in the name of their community. Currently, there are 615 First Nation communities, which represent more than 50 nations or cultural groups and 50 Aboriginal languages.
More than one million people in Canada identify themselves as an Aboriginal person, or 4% of the population (as of 2006). Fifty-three percent are registered Indians, 30% are Métis, 11% are Non-status Indians and 4% are Inuit. Over half (54%) of Aboriginal people live in urban areas.
Canada- First Nations- Questions children ask...
Children's section- we answer your most frequently-asked questions about Aboriginal peoples.
Are all Aboriginal people in Canada the same?
Not at all! There are three groups: First Nations, Inuit and Métis
How can I tell the different Aboriginal peoples apart?
To be able to recognize which group a person might belong to, you would need to become familiar with Aboriginal cultures, languages and where the different groups can be found in Canada
How can I tell where an Aboriginal person is from?
To be able to recognize which group a person might belong to, you would need to become familiar with Aboriginal cultures, languages and where the different groups can be found in Canada
Do First Nations people all speak the same language?
No way! There are actually 53 different First Nations languages spoken in Canada, and that's without including the different dialects of these languages!
How can I tell where an Aboriginal person is from?
Their name can often give you a good idea, or knowing what part of the country they're from, but the best way is always just to ask them!
Can First Nations people from different groups in Canada understand one another
Some of the 53 languages have common roots, so speakers of these languages can communicate fairly well. Other languages are completely, totally different. For instance, Haida and Mi'kmaq speakers would certainly have to speak English to understand one another.
Do all First Nations people live in First Nations communities?
No. Slightly more than half of all First Nations people in Canada live in towns and cities.
What are pow-wows? Can anyone go to a pow-wow?
Pow-wows today are celebrations of Aboriginal culture, especially dance and music. They are open to anyone who wants to enjoy learning about and experiencing Aboriginal cultures. They are also a good way to meet and talk to Aboriginal people in your area and, of course, to meet old friends and make new ones!
Why are Elders considered to be so special?
Elders are greatly respected for their patience and understanding, their life experiences, and their knowledge of traditional culture and language.
How did Aboriginal people get through the really cold winters in Canada many years ago?
Aboriginal people prepared for the harsh winter season by storing much food and supplies and moving their camps to more sheltered places. They also wore many layers of warmer clothing, a technique now widely used as the most efficient way to keep both warm and dry in cold weather.
Are there any famous Aboriginal people in Canada's history?
Lots of them! A partial list would include the famous leaders Chief Crowfoot (Blackfoot, Alberta) and Joseph Brant (Mohawk, Ontario) as well as television actor Jay Silverheels (Mohawk, Ontario), but there are many, many others.
Do First Nations people still wear feathers, beads, deerskin and things like that?
Some of them do, but only for special ceremonies or for competition dancing at pow-wows. Aboriginal people today dress the same as everyone else.
What do Inuit kids do for fun?
They play traditional Inuit games, as well as most of the same things you probably do for fun.
Why are some First Nations called "bands" and others are called "tribes"?
In Canada, First Nations are sometimes referred to as "bands"; in the United States they are often called "tribes". Many bands today prefer to be called First Nations.
Is the word "reserve" still used for where First Nations people live?
Yes. It describes land set aside by the federal government for Band use.
What kind of houses do Aboriginal people live in? Do they still live in tipis and igloos?
First Nations and Inuit stopped living in traditional dwellings such as tipis, longhouses (First Nations) and igloos (Inuit) many, many years ago. Today, Aboriginal people live in the same kind of houses as everyone else in whatever part of Canada they live in.
Do Inuit still use igloos and dog sleds?
Yes and no. On hunting trips the igloo has mostly been replaced by modern, lightweight tents, although good survival training still teaches how to build one for use in an emergency. The use of dog sleds was discontinued decades ago in favour of snowmobiles, although they are still very popular with tourists in the North!
Do First Nations people still wear long braids?
Some of the men still do, and of course many women do as well, but modern hairstyles are far more common.
Do Inuit still hunt seals and other animals for food? What do Aboriginal people eat?
Some Inuit still hunt for traditional game such as seals and caribou, but except at special feasts, most Inuit and First Nations people shop at the local grocery store and eat the same foods as you!
Canada's Gateway to Aboriginal Heritage...
A Children's site- games etc. love it..
http://www.civilization.ca/cmc/exhibitions/tresors/ethno/ety0102e.shtml
-------------------------------------------------------
OUR CANADA- STUFF U MAYBE DIDN'T KNOW
4 different lists.... each have Canadian Inventions the other has not.... so if you really want to know.... check them all out.. below... 2, 3 and 4...
Acrylics (Plexiglas/Perspex/Lucite- William Chalmers
Actar 911 CPR Dummy - Dianne Croteau, Richard Brault and Jonathan Vinden
air-conditioned railway coach - Henry Ruttan (1858)
Antigravity suit - Wilbur R. Franks (1940)
Balderdash - Laura Robinson and Paul Toyne (1984)
Basketball- James Naismith was the Canadian physical education instructor who invented basketball in 1891 (1892)
batteryless radio (AC radio tube) - Edward Samuel Rogers Sr. (1925)
bovril
butter substitute
Canadarm - SPAR and the National Aeronautical Establishment (1981)
calcium carbide and acetylene gas (production of)- Thomas L. "Carbide" Wilson (1892)
carcino embryonic antigen (CEA) blood test - Dr. Phil Gold (1968)
cardiac intensive care unit (first)
cobalt bomb- University of Saskatchewan and Eldorado Mining and Refining (1951)
compound marine engine - Benjamin Franklin Tibbets compound revolving snow shovel (trains)
computerized braille
crash position indicator (C.P.I) - Harry T. Stevinson and David M. Makow (1959)
dental mirror
disintegrating plastic
ear piercer
electric cooking range - Thomas Ahearn (1882)
electric hand prosthesis for children - Helmut Lukas (1971)
electrical car (North America's first)
electric wheelchair - George J. Klein
elecron microscope- Prof. E. F. Burton and Cecil Hall, James Hillier and Albert Prebus (late 1930s)
electronic wave organ - Frank Morse Robb (1927)
explosives vapour detector - Dr Lorne Elias (1990)
fathometer- Reginald Fessenden
film developing tank
five pin bowling- Thomas E. Ryan (1909)
foghorn - Robert Foulis (1854)
frozen fish - Dr. Archibald G. Huntsman (1926)
Garbage bag (green plastic) - Harry Wasyluk and Larry Hanson (1950s)
Gestalt Photo Mapper - G. Hobrough (1975)
gingerale - John J. McLaughlin (1904)
Goalie mask - Jacques Plante (1959)
Green Ink - Thomas Sterry Hunt (1862)
hair tonic
heart valve operation (first)
helicopter trap (for landing on ships)
helium as a substitute for hydrogen in airships
hydrofoil boat - Alexander Graham Bell and Casey Baldwin (1908)
IMAX- Grahame Ferguson, Roman Kroitor, Robert Kerr (1968)
instant potato flakes - Dr. Edward Asselbegs and the Food Research Institute (1962)
insulation
Insulin (as diabetes treatment) - Dr. Frederick Banting (Canadian), Dr. Charles Best and Dr. Collip (1921)
Java- James Gosling
Jetline
Jolly jumper - Olivia Poole
kerosene - Abraham Gesner (1840)
lacrosse - played since the 1600s; William George Beers set out standard rules (1860)
laser (sailboat) - Bruce Kirby, Ian Bruce and Hans Fogh (1969)
lightbulb (first patented) - Henry Woodward (1874)
liposomes
machine gun tracer bullet
MacPherson gas mask
measure for footwear
Muskol
Newtsuit - Phil Nuytten
newsprint - Charles Fenerty (1838)
Nursing Mother Breast Pads- Marsha Skrypuch(1986)
Pablum- Drs. Alan Brown, Fred Tisdall, and Theo Drake (1930s)
pacemaker - Wilfred Bigelow
paint roller - Norman Breakey (1940)
panoramic camera - John Connon (1887)
Phi (position homing indicator for aircraft)
Pictionary - Rob Angel (1986)
pizza pizza telephone computer delivery services
portable high chair
Puzz-3D
(A) Question of Scruples - Robert Simpson (1984)
radar profile recorder - NRC (1947)
radio compass
retractable beer carton handle (Tuck-away-handle Beer Carton) - Steve Pasjac (1957)
rollerskate
screw propeller
ski-binding
Snowblower - Arthur Sicard (1927)
Snowmobile- Joseph-Armand Bombardier(1937)
snowplow (rotary) - invented by J.W. Elliot (1869), first built by Leslie Brothers (1883)
steam foghorn
standard time - Sir Sanford Fleming (1879)
Stanley Cup - (Canada's Governor-General) Lord Stanley of Preston (1893)
Stol aircraft - de Havilland Canada (1948)
submarine telegraph cable
Superman - Joe Shuster and Jerome Siegel (1938)
Table Hockey- Donald Munro (1930s)
telephone - Alexander Graham Bell (1874)
Trivial Pursuit - Chris Haney, John Haney and Scott Abbott (1982)
variable Pitch Propeller - Wallace Rupert Turnbull (1918)
Walkie-Talkie - Donald L. Hings (1942)
washing machine
wirephoto - Sir William Stephenson (1921)
Yachtzee
Zipper- Gideon Sundback (1913)
Thanks, in partto the the books Made In Canada (Laubach Literacy of Canada) and
Canada Firsts (Ralph Nader, Nadia Milleron and Duff Conacher) for help with this page!
SNAPSHOT...
5 pin bowling ...invented by Thomas F.Ryan a Canadian in 1909.
Abdominizer ...the infomercial exerciser invented by Dennis Colonello in 1984.
Able Walker ...the walker was patented by Norm Rolston in 1986
Air-Conditioned Railway Coach ...invented by Henry Ruttan in 1858
Analytical Plotter ...3D map-making system invented by Uno Vilho Helava in 1957.
Andromonon ...Three-wheeled vehicle invented in 1851 by Thomas Turnbull.
Anti-Gravity Suit.....invented by Wilbur Rounding Franks in 1941
Automatic Foghorn...The first steam foghorn was invented by Robert Foulis in 1859.
Basketball......invented by James Naismith in 1891
Bone Marrow Compatibility Test ...invented by Barbara Bain in 1960
Canada Dry Ginger Ale.....invented in 1907 by John A. McLaughlin
Chocolate Nut Bar.....Arthur Ganong made the first nickel bar in 1910
Computerized Braille ...invented by Roland Galarneau in 1972
Electric Car Heater ...Thomas Ahearn invented the first electric car heater in 1890
Electric Cooking Range ...Thomas Ahearn invented the first in 1882
Electric Light Bulbs.....Henry Woodward invented the electric light bulb in 1874 and the patent was sold to Thomas Edison
Electric Organ.....Morse Robb of Belleville, Ontario, patented the world's first electric organ in 1928
Explosives Vapour Detector - invented by Dr Lorne Elias in 1990
Gramophone......co-invented by Alexander Graham Bell & Emile Berliner in 1889
Heart-Pacemaker.....invented by Dr. John A. Hopps in 1950
Helium Extraction from Natural Gas...invented by Sir John Cunningham McLennan in 1915
Instant Mashed Potatoes.....dehydrated potato flakes were invented by Edward A. Asselbergs, in 1962
Insulin isolated ....by Dr. Frederick G. Banting and Dr. Charles H. Best in 1921
JAVA Software programming language ...invented by James Gosling in 1994.
Jetliner ...the first jetliner was designed by James Floyd in 1949
Jolly Jumper ...a baby's delight invented by Olivia Poole in 1959.
Kerosene.....invented by Doctor Abraham Gesner in 1846
Paint Roller.....invented by Norman Breakey of Toronto in 1940
Plexiglas ...(Polymerized Methyl Methacrylate).... invented by William Chalmers in 1931
Potato Digger.....invented by Alexander Anderson in 1856
Prosthetic Hand ...an electric prosthetic invented by Helmut Lucas in 1971
Railway Car Brake.....invented by George B. Dorey in 1913
Railway Sleeper Car ...invented by Samuel Sharp in 1857
Snowblower.......invented by Arthur Sicard in 1925
Snowmobile......invented by Joseph-Armand Bombardier in 1922
standard time - Sir Sanford Fleming (1879)
Stanley Cup - (Canada's Governor-General) Lord Stanley of Preston (1893)
Television.....Reginald A. Fessenden patented a television system in 1927
Television Camera.....invented by F. C. P. Henroteau in 1934
Telephone....invented by Alexander Graham Bell in 1876
Undersea Telegraph Cable ...invented by Fredrick Newton Gisborne in 1857
Walkie-Talkie......invented by Donald L. Hings in 1942
Wireless Radio......invented by Reginald A. Fessenden in 1900
Zipper.....invented by Gideon Sundback in 1913
--------------
Walk A Little Straighter Daddy (and Mommy)
Now all these years later... and billy c. still has the same friends and peers mostly that he started out with... Carson Chamberlain has taken part in all billy c.'s 3 albums. His songwriting is almost as well known as his own albums and songs.... and yes, he's that good.
And he's still our backwoods son of Georgia. Born in Savannah and raised in Rincon, Georgia- and loves his fishing and hunting and is a master at both (well in those days... it meant food for the table for some- in our time- it was everything on food). Billy c's roots trace back from his grandaddy to walking with General Robert E. Lee... and u just don't get more South than that.
We love his music... and many of his fans, friends and "billy c angels" have actually become the best of friends (and all billy c's charities- he does a quick video... and we send in the dough- always for his great causes)... for years...going on 7 years for me. Billy c. stole my heart with Walk A Little Straighter Daddy... and he kept it... and made incredible country music fun again... and now continue on with my idols, icons and treasures and some newbies along the way- what a way to wanna be.
Love my country and classical and some my sons taught me.... and great songwriters are a tremendous weakness of mine... especially lady writers who make the song.... incredible for whoever puts their voice to it. Example are Good Directions (Rachel Thibodeau who's no slouch and what a voice that lady has in her own right); and Heal Me (Bonnie Swayze).... both of these incredible songs have women co-authors... and that's a lot to be proud of.
Christmas is here... and this is the song.... that touches a lot of our hearts... from some rather ugly memories- .. of the season... and how our babies, children and youngbloods see us as the 'growups' in their lives- and they pray that we be good for Christmas and New Year's. MADD adopted this song... nationally for one of their campaigns.
Love u billy c... and maybe this Christmas- we will all walk a little straighter honey.
One of billy c's first reviews...
Billy Currington Walks a Little Straighter With Debut Hit
October 13, 2003; Written by Edward Morris (for CMT USA)
If you look closely at the names of all the music-biz folks Billy Currington thanks in the liner notes for his self-titled debut album, you'll conclude that he's not exactly the new kid in town. And you'll be right. The face may be fresh, but those eyes have seen a lot of action.
In his notes, Currington thanks the owner of a club he played at on his way up, the record label president who gave him his first shot and then passed on him, the publishers who hired him to sing demos, the veteran songwriter who became his roommate and fishing tutor, the star who cut his first song and the big names who offered to manage him after he finally landed a contract with Mercury Records. "I skipped so many names," he admits ruefully, "but it was a crazy day when I wrote them out."
He's had a lot of "crazy days" lately. His first single, "Walk a Little Straighter," which portrays a little boy chiding his drunken father, gave Currington instant prominence and helped land him a guest appearance on the Grand Ole Opry. It also took him to Canada to shoot the accompanying music video. And, like all young artists, he's had to do a whirlwind tour of radio stations to introduce himself to disc jockeys. Now, as "Walk a Little Straighter" climbs into the Top 10, he's getting ready to beat the promotional drums for his follow-up single, "I Got a Feeling."
Apart from the physical exhaustion, though, Currington says he enjoyed the radio tour: "I had a blast. I had a great time. I got to see so many places that I'd never seen and met a lot of nice people. It was tiring many days. You're getting up at 4 in the morning, and you're going until 4 in the morning. But, overall, it was a great thing for us to do."
There's no doubt that Billy Currington -- the album -- conveys a lot of its namesake's history and outlook. After all, Currington co-wrote all but one of the 11 songs. His hard-drinking stepfather was the inspiration for "Walk a Little Straighter." Many of the other songs -- "That's Just Me," "Where the Girls Are," "Growin' Up Down There," "Ain't What It Used To Be" -- pulsate with small-town imagery and blue-collar attitudes.
Currington grew up in Rincon, Ga., a small community not far from Savannah. His family was poor. Another person he salutes in his liner notes is his childhood friend, Matt Thompson, "for buying my lunch in school when I couldn't." "I never found lunch money on the table on my way to school," he explains. "That wasn't because my mom didn't want to. She just didn't have it." Despite his stepfather's shortcomings, he did introduce young Billy to country music via the records of Willie Nelson, Waylon Jennings, Kenny Rogers and the Statler Brothers, among others.
It was at a friend's church that Currington got his first chance to sing in public -- and to be appreciated for it. The pastor of the church was so impressed with the youngster's performing ability that he drove him to Nashville to audition for a singing job at the now defunct Opryland amusement park. Currington, then a high school junior, didn't make the cut, but he did keep the dream of being a performer.
In 1992, after he had finished high school, Currington moved to Nashville. He stayed there for eight months before retreating to home. He came back about six months later, and this time he stayed on. "I played in several different clubs around Nashville with a band," he says. "I always put a band together. Then, when I started writing songs for a living, when I got my publishing deal, I started doing songwriter nights with just an acoustic guitar, which was something new to me. At the same time that I got my publishing deal, I also started doing demos." (A demo is a basic recording of a new song that publishers use to pitch the song to recording artists.) Currington's first publishing contract was with Major Bob Music, the company that gave Garth Brooks his songwriting start.
"I've done demos for several songs that have been cut but which have never been singles," Currington continues. "I did two that George Strait recorded. Marty Raybon of Shenandoah cut one. There was one that I wrote myself that Tracy Byrd cut. It was my first cut, called 'Crazy Every Time.' [The song appears on Byrd's Ten Rounds album.] Just here lately, Kenny Rogers recorded a song I demoed about five years ago, "Home Depot Hero."
Singing demos did more for Currington than provide him an income. It also taught him lessons in songwriting and vocal styling. "You learn so many different people's melodies," he says, "and you actually get to practice singing melodies you never sang before. So it opens you up to new things, new ideas."
One of the significant figures Currington encountered as he threaded his way through the Music Row labyrinth was Frank Dycus, the writer of such hits as "Unwound," "Down and Out" and "I Don't Need Your Rockin' Chair." "Frank ended up becoming a roommate of mine," Currington says. "Me and him and another guy, Mike Taliaferro, who [helps manage] Tracy Byrd, became roommates in this big old house, bigger than anything we needed. We lived together for about two years. Frank is one of the smartest guys I've ever met, not only as a songwriter but as an all-around human being. My granddaddy taught me how to fish as a kid, but Frank Dycus taught me how to really fish -- to go out and catch the big ones."
For a while, it looked like Currington might end up on one of the RCA labels. "[RCA Label Group chairman Joe Galante] gave me my first shot at a record contract," the singer explains. "He gave me enough money to go cut three songs, and I did that. And he gave me money to do a showcase. Eventually, after all that was done, he passed on the situation. He decided not to give me a full record deal and let me go on my own. During that time -- it took six months or so to go through that whole process -- I met so many [important] people. He never treated me like he didn't like it or anything. He just said it wasn't for him."
Fortunately, Currington had by this time made another label connection. It came about through songwriter and producer Carson Chamberlain. "Carson and I met because he had put a hold on a song of mine for Mark Wills, who he was producing at the time. I happened to run into him at a local restaurant, and I said, 'Hey, man, I want to thank you for putting that song on hold, and I'm glad you liked it.' We talked about writing together one day, and we did. We wrote some of the songs that ended up on this record. But those songs ended up on demos first, and those demos were taken to [Mercury Records chief] Luke Lewis, who liked what he heard." Chamberlain got the job of producing Currington's first album, and he co-wrote six of its songs.
So have his successes turned Currington into a hometown hero in Rincon, Ga.? "Things have changed for sure," he concedes. "I don't know whether I'd [call myself] a hometown hero, but I think the people are excited."
Walk A Little Straighter lyrics
I remember looking up
To look up to him
And I remember most the time
He wasn't there
I'd be waiting at the door
When he got home at night
He'd pass me by to go to pass out in his chair
And I'd say
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're swaying side to side
You're footsteps make me dizzy
And no matter how I try
I keep tripping and stumbling
If you'd look down here you'd see
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're leading me
He stumbled in the gym
On graduation day
And I couldn't help but feel
So ashamed
And I wasn't surprised a bit
When he didn't stay
He stumbled out before they called my name
And I thought
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're swaying side to side
It's not just me who's watching
you've caught everybody's eye
And you're tripping and stumbling
and even though I've turned 18
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're still leading me
The old mans still like he always was
But I love him anyway
If I've learned one thing from him
Its my kids will never have to say
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're swaying side to side
You're footsteps make me dizzy
And no matter how I try
I keep tripping and stumbling
if you'd look down here you'd see
Walk a little straighter daddy
You're leading me
Yeah walk a little straighter daddy
You're leading me
-------------------
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.