NOVA
SCOTIA HOME 4 COLOURED CHILDREN- We want
Justice- We Want an Inquiry- Which political party will step up in Nova Scotia
and say ‘yes’ 2 an inquiry in2 the horrific black on black abuse of the
children of the Nova Scotia Home 4 Coloured Children- Opened 1921
NOVA SCOTIA HOME 4 COLOURED CHILDREN- SYSTEMIC HORRIFIC BLACK ON BLACK CHILD ABUSE- WE WANT JUSTICE- WE WANT AN INQUIRY....
Home
for colored children board OK with abuse inquiry
November
19, 2012 - 2:38pm By CLARE MELLOR Staff Reporter
and
‘The
silence is deafening’
November
8, 2012 - 5:11am | By EVA HOARE Staff Reporter
THE
OFFICE of African Nova Scotian Affairs has been strangely quiet in the midst of
calls for a public inquiry into allegations of abuse at the Nova Scotia Home
for Colored Children, says a leading member of a group of former residents.
“The...
-------------------
Child
Predators on the Internet
10News
Anchor Kimberly Hunt investigates child predators on the internet. She also
gets unprecedented access from the FBI, to its investigation of NAMBLA.
Net
Lingo & Child Safety: Decoding The Code
Kidproof
TV takes you on a quiz to see how much net lingo (sometimes called 'net slang')
you really know. As a parent, understanding this unique cryptic online language
is key in keeping your kids safe online.
To
Catch a Predator Anonymous: Operation Darknet Hackers root out child
pornographers
Our
manifesto:
All
of our Releases/Hacks/Progress are located at:
Visit
and support us at http://irc.lc/anonops/opdarknet
Donate
securely with a Credit Card/Paypal/eCheck:
Donate
Bitcoins At:
1Zgcp37QGUgyTF3J4Rd8oVZzCG6jszZia
Justice
is Expensive...
We
are Anonymous.
We
are Legion.
We
do not forgive.
We
do not forget.
Expect
us.
--------------------
OUR
CANADIAN SON.... we remember
Martin
Kruze was raped by homosexuals Gordon Stuckless and George Hannah at the
Toronto Mapleleaf Gardens. After years
of
dealing with the pain and violation related to his sexual abuse, Martin Kruze
committed suicide by jumping off the Don Valley
Bridge
on October 30, 1997. The APA declined to talk about the trauma Martin Kruze
went through when they talked about ways
because
of martin and so many commiting suicide from the horrors of rape and abuse- as
children- and those trying to get better-
CANADA - Dr. Irving with Victors of abuse and those families who lost
their sons and daughters to suicide- created the following miracle of healing 4
all:
CHILD
ABUSE SURVIVOR MONUMENT- Toronto, Canada-
4 the victors over childabuse- and those who did NOT make it...
The
Survivor Monument Project was active at its Birch Avenue studio from 1997 to
2003.
Survivor
and supporter participation in creating the quilt squares of the Child Abuse
Monument was completed in 2003. In May of 2005 The Survivor Monument Project
finished its work at the Birch Studio. Dr. Irving has continued to be directly
involved in the fine art bronze casting of the large Monument figures.
When
funding permits, Dr. Irving will complete the bronze casting of the second
"Reaching Out" figure.
Dr.
Michael Irving led
sculpting
and poetry
workshops
to create the
materials
of the Child
Abuse
Survivor
Monument
Project.
The
sculpted quilt
squares
and poetry of
the
workshop
participants
became the
resource
material of the
project's
many activities.
The
four art and poetry
books
linked to from this
web
page tell the story
of:
the confrontation with
the
angst and legacy of
child
abuse; the struggle
to
find answers and
understanding;
the
difficult
journey of
healing;
the value and
power
of connecting with
others;
the movement
into
healing and
recovery;
the freedoms
and
victories that are the
rewards
of
perseverance.
These
books are
presented
here to assist
others
with understanding
and
healing.
We
are seeking a
publisher
who would
publish
these as art and
poetry
books. Contact
Dr.
Irving at
mci@irvingstudios.com
"HandPrints
to Give Kids a Hand"
(PDF
version of instructions for printing)
(PDF
version of template page for printing)
Sculptor
and Psychotherapist, Dr. Michael C. Irving is asking you to share his vision of
"A massive visualization of the world we want for children" by
letting your hand join others inside the "Reaching Out Child Abuse
Monument."
Dr.
Irving and the participants who collaborated with him to sculpt the quilt
squares of the "Reaching Out" Monument shared a common desire that
the Child Abuse Monument would be an extraordinary force assisting with helping
survivors to heal and for the prevention of child abuse.
The
sculpture above is the first completed bronze of two figures composing the
"Reaching Out" monument vignette. The second figure will take another
year to complete after funding is raised for the art foundry process.
Dr.
Irving is using the first figure as the centre piece of the "Creating A
New Reality" campaign to generate a massive "National Visualization
of Healing and Prevention." Dr. Irving is asking people to draw an outline
of their hand on a piece of paper and just sign their initials or write a
message.
The
HandPrint Visualizations can be for:
a.)
Prevention of abuse;
b.)
Support for survivors or
c.)
Story telling and healing for yourself;
We
have thousands of these hand drawings now. When both monument figures are done
we will place all of the "Creating A New Reality" papers inside the
two monument figures. Their energy and messages will serve for centuries as a
national visualization creating healing and prevention. protect children.
A
large space inside the Monument figures allow for the placement of hand
outlines and messages on pieces of paper. People are asked to draw an outline
of their hand on a piece of paper (8.5 inches by 11 inches) and write a message
on or around the hand outline.
An
outline of your hand on a regular piece of paper would be a wonderful
contribution towards this visualized intention. Also, ask some of your friends,
colleagues or family to make an outline of their hand and send for inclusion as
a collective visualization in the monument. Instructions and directions for the
"Creating A New Reality" Visualization can be found directly below:
Children
at schools, shopping malls, churches and community centres gave Dr. Irving
outlines of hands with messages for a collective visualization
of
our intention to protect children.
The
hand outlines and messages on this web page will be included inside the
"Reaching Out" Child Abuse Monument as part of a "National
Visualization" healing for survivors and prevention of child abuse".
Will
your hand be there along side them?
Child
Abuse,
You
don't have to worry.
It
Stops Now.
Nikko,
age 11
Your
hand outline and message can join thousands of other Canadians who have
contributed to making the "Art" of the Child Abuse Monument.
Don’t
abuse your kids.
Stop
and give a hand.
Kids
have feelings.
Don’t
because kids are
humans.
I
wish for child abuse to stop. I wish for peace.
Aaron,
age9
I
love being a Kid.
I
think child abuse should stop and stop NOW!!!
Kyle,
age 8
Why
should child abuse happen. We don't want it happening, no one does. So, Don't
do it.
Clair,
age 11
Keep
the peace in your home, school and in your HEART.
Shanese,
age 10
Through
2008 until the fall of 2011
we
are still accepting hand outlines
for
placement inside the "Reaching Out" Child Abuse Monument
To
contribute a "Create a New Reality Visualization" for placement
inside The "Reaching Out" Child Abuse Monument.
1.
Draw an outline of your hand on a piece of 8 1/2 x 11 paper or the back of your
printout;
2.
On or around the outline of your hand, write or draw message of:
**
a .) Prevention of abuse;
**
b.) Support for survivors or
**
c.) Story telling and healing for yourself;
3.
Send your personal "Creating A New Reality" HandPrint for the Child
Abuse Monument to:
"Reaching
Out" Child Abuse Monument c/o
Dr.
Michael C. Irving
274
Rhodes Ave.
Toronto,
Ontario
Canada,
M4L 3A3
You
can also "Create A New Reality" with a donation. You do not need to
give a donation to contribute a hand, though your donations are greatly
appreciated.
Even
donations of $10.00 or $20.00 will help to bring the monument to schools,
community centres and events for gather contributions for the "Creating A
New Reality" Vision.
Cheques
can be made out to The Survivor Monument Project and sent to the address above
or donate online directly below.
Make
a donation with PayPal or
donate
with a major credit card through PayPal
HandPrint
Visualizations
The
"HandPrints" of the "Creating A New Reality" Vision can be
a simple outline of a hand with an initial or name. If you want you can include
a message or images. They serve as a written visualization of our intention to
provide healing support for survivors and protection of children. As an
extraordinary collective coming together of positive visualizations inside the
"Reaching Out" Monument the Hands will be a force for change today
and tomorrow.
At
schools across the country children drew an outline of their hand and wrote a
message.
Messages
written on outlines of hands were displayed in shopping malls from the Atlantic
to the Pacific. What a powerful "National Visualization".
STORIES
OF FEAR- OF CHILD ABUSE- ALL AROUND THE WORLD
He's
Watching
Mysterious
nights went by, slowly unnumbered,
While
her innocent body lay in an enchantingly deep slumber.
A
monster in the dark lurked about
Conjuring
up evil, so for her, there was no way out.
He
cast his evil spell that fathomed her soul.
No
one was she to tell, when from her innocence he stole.
There’s
nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.
He’s
sneering, waiting, and watching.
Sighs
of the dawn suddenly appear
and
the secrets of the night are profoundly made clear.
King
of the giants, with all of their knowledge, could not foresee
the
woe, the pain and the misery.
Poison
still lingers in the air.
No
need to worry, for he is still there.
He’s
sneering, waiting, and watching.
The
sun begins to shine through the shadowy veil.
Time
heals all wounds and life prevails.
The
evil of the night no longer hoovers over her breast.
She
can sleep without crying and fear is put to rest.
Her
beauty is more captivating with each passing day,
Yet,
taunting memories still creep in her way.
He’s
sneering, waiting, and watching.
Pulled
out of dreamland by an overwhelming fright,
Make
him stop! What’s that sound? I’m scared!
Who
keeps lurking in the night?
Her
trembling heart is silenced by the refuge that is near.
Was
it a dream or is he still there?
Her
conscience is seared!
She
knows he is still there,
Sneering,
waiting and watching,
Somewhere?
By:
Connie Lee/Founder/President of the FACSA Foundation
Springhill,
LA.
STATISTICS
ON CHILD ABUSE
IN
CANADA
A
child dies every week in Canada at the hands of a care-giver.
(Statistics
Canada, 1980-89)
70%
of children who are victims of homicide are killed before the age of 5.
(Statistics
Canada, 1980-89)
80%
of abusers are known to their child victims.
(Dr.
Harriett MacMillan et al., McMaster University, J.A.M.A., July, 1997)
More
than 90% of child abuse cases are unreported.
(The
Gallup Organization, 1995)
1
out of every 3 female children, and 1 out of every 5 male children in Canada
will be sexually abused before they reach adulthood.
(The
National Clearinghouse on Family Violence, 1994)
Children
with disabilities are 10 times more vulnerable to sexual abuse than
non-disabled children.
(National
Committee to Prevent Child Abuse, 1996)
BEWARE
THE NIGHT
Beware!
Beware this street laced
with
hungry dogs
Impatiently
licking their lips
in
shadowy doorways
I
hear them gnawing on the fragment
bones
of ignorance and innocence
I
am destined to be savaged
by
a rabid dog,
for
I walk unseen
close
in the shadows of tall
building
and I must surly
meet
such beasts
But
again if I seek the bright
openness
of the neon lights,
green
eyes from the bordering
malevolent
darkness wait
to
jump out to render me
Be
vigilant friend if passing
you
hear, echoing
from
the blackened ally way,
de-vouring
snarl
--
Beware! ----
Alison
RESPONDING
TO THE VOICE OF CHILDREN
Dear
Dr. Irving,
In
recent weeks you attended Downtown Alternative School to discuss your Child
Abuse Survivor Monument Project with the students. My child was one of those
students and the effect your project had on her has prompted me to write you
and express my thanks. The children made paper hands to put inside the monument
with comments expressing their thoughts and feelings on the issue of child
abuse.
Late
that evening, when my child was in bed, she turned to me and asked if I knew
about child abuse. She then told me about the project. The events of the day
had a strong impact on her. She could not understand how people could be cruel
to children.
We
talked at length. My daughter would like to see the monument stand for
thousands of years to let future generations know that the people of our time
had a caring side, that we were aware of the suffering and tried to do
something about it.
Something
as simple as the making of a paper hand opened up a door to awareness for my
eleven-year old child. For this gift, I thank you.
Elizabeth
Sellwood, Mother
May
24, 1999
HANDPRINT
SQUARE-
Incest
Deep
in my core lies hidden
the
seed of life -
lost
amidst the pain
of
someone else’s choice.
Incestuous
abuse
ravages
my childhood,
steals
my future,
destroys
my SELF.
Agony
courses
through
my veins:
Burning,
Freezing,
Struggling,
Debilitating.
There
is power in my choice -
I
choose to feel the pain,
to
grieve the loss, to be sad;
to
Live, to BE.
Ruth
Cook
RUTH'S
HANDPRINT
Traps
Traps
are set for tiny things
Hopeless,
small, with no wings.
Escape
is not a question here
Shadows,
shadows everywhere.
Scream
the words that hold you tight
Take
a leap into the night.
Babette
Healy
BABETTE'S
HANDPRINT
Silk
Ribbons
My
chains of bondage forced, not wanted
I
am alone waiting for the key.
Please
mommy help me...nothing, no one
Only
silk ribbons in the breeze cascading from
my
hair...pretty, but silent...helpless
Time
-- loss -- found
Courage!
From
my soul...I’m afraid, need to tell
Told!
I live...free
to
soar.
Tracy
Kloske
Thread
of Hope
Oh
my soul screams in silence
I
weep...my loss is so deep
Torn,
ripped and thrown away
I
am forgotten...no place in your world
Drowned
in an instant - a moment lost forever
Holding
on --- letting go
Suspended
by a thread of hope
From
hell to here -- here to the future
Anticipation
- unknown
Tracy
Kloske
TRACY'S
HANDPRINT
Silenced
Voice
I
have no voice.
I
draw in silence.
I
speak through my drawings.
Our
silent tears are overflowing with screaming pain,
Our
Mother’s hate inflicted upon her child, for a lifetime to remain.
The
Beast’s hand created too many tears.
For
each tormented tear we created a child,
My
voice of what I hear and see from so many children inside.
In
my drawings you’ll see the torture we survived.
Please,
Please don’t destroy my silent voice.
Keep
it safe,
Protect
it,
So
we can share it.
Please,
Please don’t throw out my silent voice.
You
see, we must say “Hello” to the pain in our silent tears
Before
we can say “Goodbye” to the pain we survived in fear.
Gloria
Large
and
The
Chorus Line
I
Remember
I
died as I was born.
I
saw the light,
Quickly
my soul was torn.
Softly
in the night,
Pain
became my friend.
Sadness
and devastation my end.
Clutching
at beauty of rock and tree,
To
ease the cold within.
Searching
for the light,
Finding
the fire.
Burned
again and again.
Fireflies,
flowers, snakes and rats,
Never
will it end.
I
remember when butterflies were free,
When
sap ran sweetly from the tree,
I
held my puppy close to me, for comfort.
I
remember when blood ran from my mouth
Like
ice cream dripping
From
a cone on a hazy afternoon.
I
remember riding my horse in the shade of the wood
Picnic
lunches all alone
My
fantasy land of Robin Hood
Castles
and guard we all stood.
I
remember people all dressed in black
Incense
burning
I
want to turn back.
I
remember the knives,
The
will of the group
The
chanting, the dancing,
This
was no fun group.
I
remember the sounds, of screams in the dark
Of
death and destruction
On
a Saturday night.
I
remember crucifixions
In
God’s Holy name
Face
up on the floor
Nailed
in my pain.
Rebecca
Martin
MESSAGE
Reality
came when I placed my hand in the plaster. As I sat with lamp support, Monica,
Jackie, Sue - I felt like a person. I felt like what it feels like to be in
existence. I finally feel like I am the reason to heal - even though there are
many other reasons, I have never felt like I was a reason.
There
is a lot of grief at what I lost. As I look behind me from the mountain top,
you see I believe I’ve climbed one peak, I look and see the storms and valleys
I have walked through - I feel God and Jesus have been there all along from the
beginning
Eye(s)
see you forever
Eye(s)
see you forever
Eye(s)
see you forever
Watching
the black cold
feeling
my terror, my shame
I’m
crying desperate and needy for someone
Not
those crazy orange people!
Satan
is laughing, the madness of blindness
Dirty,
yucky stupid girl!
Is
there any worth to the life
Slowly,
inside the warmth returns with God
with
grief, with fear of the
birth
about to happen
Watching
me, watching, watching, watching
Tenderness
in my hand.
Clare
Nickerson
Secret
No More
The
pain is mine
The
knot in my stomach that is there now
Has
been with me all my life
The
gruesome craving to eat raw meat today
Taught
to me by cult members yesterday
Encouraged
by mother, the witch
How
did I get there ?
In
my daddie’s car of midnight blue
Oh
how poignant !
This
child’s favourite colour.
The
joy of the colour masked the fear
and
set the tears to shame
The
tricycle - midnight blue, of course
To
share a ride with sister
I
was too small to help.
She
screamed
I
hurt for I was stepped on as I fell at my daddie’s feet
I
cried but no one cared,
So
I went to the garden to bury another soul of mine
I
was a baby wanting to be held
wanting
to be hugged
wanting
to be loved
wanting
to be cherished
But
I was nothing, just another piece of meat
The
tightness of my breath
The
pain in my chest.
Will
not stop me any longer.
I
will run no more.
I
will open the doors, not in vigilance
But
in preparedness to yell
NO
MORE ! NO MORE !
The
secret will be told
I
will hug and love and cherish the child in me
There
will be no more beatings that cause life long bruises
EXPOSE
; EXPOSE ; EXPOSE
In
the garden, I will cultivate my spirit
It
is me
It
is mine
To
go
To
show
To
tell
A
secret no more.
Sheila
Pavey
Free
At Last
I
pull, I twist, I squeeze, I stretch
this
hard shapeless piece of wax,
Wanting
to create a picture
that
shows the honest facts.
Needing
to show the world
my
anguish, sorrow and pain,
Where
a child so full of hurt
lay
crumpled, covered with shame.
Shame
for things done to me
with
choices I never had
Constantly
told by all
that
I was the one who was bad.
As
I manipulate this piece of wax,
I
feel a warm and cleansing glow,
Where
my little spark of hope
can
finally start to grow.
Freedom
from abuse memories
that
are pulled from my dark past
To
be healed, respected and believed in
as
I begin to shout, “I am free at last!”
Cherlyn
Tannor
Realities/information/
statistics/actions
Many
addicts use drugs to escape the truth of being sexually abused. It is not
usually a conscious decision, but one that is sublimated into a socially more
acceptable activity. “It was a way to escape - there was no one to tell about
what was happening to me.” “I don’t care what people think when I’m drunk or
high.” It is more socially acceptable to be using drugs or alcohol than to talk
about the reason behind it. It takes the attention away from the sexual abuse.
Drugs and alcohol are coping mechanisms which allow addicts to be able to talk
to anyone. Most addicts need them to get through the day.
Very
few services exist to help with both issues: addictions and abuse. It needs to
be understood that the two go hand in hand. The services which do exist are
often inadequate, requiring the individual to heal only on the therapist’s
terms, or to “get clean first, then we’ll talk”. Often if you make one mistake,
you’re out of the addiction program. This isn’t fair. Only one out of every 100
people make it, perhaps because of the programs themselves.
Survivors
need to value themselves, to be true to themselves. Survivors often find it
hard to say no to anything, and survivors need to fit in, so they often say
yes. They often have no boundaries, because they often have no idea of what
boundaries are. Our abusers took away our trust. When parents, the most
trustworthy individuals in a child’s life, tell a child the boundaries and then
break them, this tells a child that it’s okay for them to go beyond the rules. As
survivor parents, we let our children take control of us because we don’t ever
want to break their trust.
We
need to understand that treatment for addictions is slow and progressive. You
cannot help addicts quickly or with some other drug.
Addictions
Resources
are going to have to address both issues: addictions and abuse. We need
facilities and clinicians that deal with both issues simultaneously - not one
day Alcoholics Anonymous, the next day therapy for abuse.
Addicted
survivors have to be able to find a way to deal with the pain without drugs or
alcohol. Eventually an addicted person reaches a point where they cannot use
the drugs or alcohol because it will kill them. Often, survivors manifesting
addictive behaviours find that the experience no longer helps. When nothing
works for them any more, this is frequently a turning point in their recovery.
There
are common central issues to both emotional and spiritual healing: there are
trust issues in both areas, as well as anger and rage, there is also terror,
shame and guilt. Healing needs to happen in each of these areas.
Are
there pressures in society which push people into addiction? “All of the
addicts I have known have been sexually abused.” Sexual abuse is a huge
contributor to addiction. Some survivors turn to prostitution, a form of
addiction.
Concerns
There
is an enormous cost to society from addictions and abuse. If we could cure or
end child abuse, we would empty prisons and eliminate drug and alcohol
problems.
What
are the possible consequences of giving out the information that the majority
of addicts were abused as children? Would this frighten the survivor? Is it
dangerous to provide the information? Many addicts could become normalized as a
result.
The
statistics and surveys are ever changing. Surveys vary because sometimes people
don’t remember being abused or they don't want to tell anyone about their
experience.
Survivors
need to feel safe to tell, or people won’t come forward to reveal their experiences
of abuse.
Confidentiality
needs to be maintained. How do we make it safe for people to ask for help? How
do we make it so that people don’t feel isolated and alone? Sometimes survivors
are the most helpful people for other survivors to talk to.
Hatred
Who’s
to pay at the end of the day
For
the cruelty and pain
That
obliterated all sunshine or rain?
Unforgiveness,
the judgement, children’s innocent illusion
The
apparent unreality and impossible resolution.
Who’s
to pay?
Who’s
to pay at the end of the day
For
the bitterness and sadness
The
overwhelming madness?
T.
Shattered
Youth
Depression
takes over and so I search my soul and my inner self,
Hoping
to discover some explanation of a senseless situation.
I
look to the mirror
What
do I see?
A
frightened child,
Please
don't let it be me.
In
the deepest regions of my confused and cluttered mind,
Are
shards of what seem to be a nightmare of the worst kind.
I
look to the mirror
What
do I see?
A
frightened child,
Please
don't let it be me.
For
years I avoided this reflection because of its unpleasantness
Swiftly
running endlessly away from the reality of its existence.
I
look to the mirror
What
do I see?
A
frightened child,
Please
don't let it be me.
A
safe life, for this young soul, would require a guard.
A
rock, a hammer, a fist, thrusting forward
Too
hard, too hurtful, too inexplicably wild,
To
obliterate the reflection of this child.
And
so, I think, I am drawn to a conclusion,
For
this child, there will be no more confusion.
Suddenly,
the pieces crash to the floor.
The
child runs frantically to get out the door.
She
searches for the exit and the blood runs cold
As
she realizes that it is surrounded by the mold
Of
the mirror that she shattered to bits that day.
Destroyed
is the escape route to a safe place to play.
T.
Metamorphosis
A
little Child, new to the land,
Came
to meet dad, far away.
Taken
from home, she is trusting and hopeful
Caring
and loving, wanting someone to know she is there.
But
she is only a child and, small and insignificant, so
Like
the caterpillar in its cocoon.
In
my family, I learned to be afraid.
Coarse
words and actions not nice to see.
A
first secret to keep inside of me.
So,
I continued to hide deeper into my
Protective
shell feeling different,
Unattractive
and used.
Two
big secrets converged for me, followed
By
panic attacks and depression, you see.
No
one to turn to, no one at all.
I’m
full of pain, anger and despair.
I
feel like I’m drowning in there.
Help
me! Stop the pain! Kill the pain! KILL ME!
No!
Wait! What about my family?
No!
Kill the pain! Take the pills! Kill me!
No!
Stop, stop! What about your family?
Help
me someone to break out of this shell!
It’s
too tight and confining, I can tell.
Help
me to find some sense of release
From
keeping these secrets all to myself.
A
wonderful lady came to my aid and now, I’m learning
To
forgive that little girl.
She
helped me to see
All
the beauty and strength inside of me.
Thank
you my friend for your patience and care
For
without you, I would not be here.
I
can never express how truly grateful I feel
About
our time working through all my problems and fears.
It
can also happen to you.
Time
is a healer and hope is there too.
Courage
is needed to block the despair
But
when you are done, all is worthwhile;
So
keep up your spirit while you try.
M.
Blanking
out
Little
girl sick –
Gagging
– hot
Little
hands
Pushing
away bloody hands
Tears
come.
Throbbing,
popping pulse
Beating
inside my thing
Crying
Stopped
breathing –
No
feeling
Blanking
out.
I
don’t like this
Too
too hard
Squishy
inside
Lost
– no center
Klutzy,
clumsy
Dear
Daddy do you “no”
I
hate.
Maureen
McGowan
Workshop
Assistant
The
Silent Pain
Physical
pain, hard
mental
anguish, hard
the
hardest thing of all ...
-
what it does to the core
Silent
not by choice
but
by force
He
is supposed to
protect
but
he kills - me
Despite
the pain
I
overcome.
Today
I am stronger
conscious
of the silent
pain
in others
No
words pass
but
so much said.
Silence
speaks loud
if
people listen
not
with ears
but
with hearts
H.
Nothing
Stuff
The
hardest thing
‘bout
child abuse is
If
you tell
You’re
ostracized.
I
told mother;
Her
eyes closed
and
opened
naught
for
two
whole years
but
By
then I knew
if
I
wanted to be heard
I
talked about the weather
and
nothing stuff.
I
lay huddled in my wool blanket
I’m
cold
I’m
hungry
I
lay listening to the February snow storm,
listening
to the wind pulling the tent
and
the snow pellets driving against
the
canvas.
I’m
so cold and hungry.
When
I grow up
I’m
going to feed my children
and
keep
them warm.
Patricia
Bear Claw
January
5, 1998
Being
involved in the Survivor Monument Project has been a wonderful experience for
me. Working with others of like background to erect a work of art that will be
on display allows me to know that never again will child abuse be swept under
the rug of secrecy. It exists! It acknowledges that and that makes it more
comfortable in my mind. I hope it helps others in similar situations to find
comfort that they are not alone - this project is breaking the silence.
Once
an Old Story
Like
a builder
I
repair and prepare
my
song
Frightened
as I crawl
change
- transform
trusting
my love
your
love
Once
this old story
held
my attention
Now
I don’t need it
Gerry
Brodey
--------------
SHELDON
KENNEDY- CHILD ABUSE SURVIVOR- who had the guts to tell Canada what happened
to a boy who loved hockey.... and the monster that destroyed a piece of his
youth 4-EV-A
To
prevent sex abuse, empower the bystander
Sheldon
Kennedy, Respect Group Inc.
Sheldon
Kennedy, Respect Group Inc.
The
following testimony was delivered on Tuesday to the U.S. Congressional
Subcommittee on Children and Families by Sheldon Kennedy, the co-founder of
Respect Group Inc.
For
many Canadians, hockey is everything. It is our passion, our culture and our
national pride. Like most boys growing up on the Prairies, I dreamed of playing
in the National Hockey League and, luckily for me, that dream came true. I
played for the Detroit Red Wings, the Boston Bruins and the Calgary Flames.
But
it’s not my dream that I’m best known for — it’s my nightmare. As a junior
hockey player, I suffered years of sexual abuse and harassment at the hands of
my coach, Graham James.
Despite
the nature of the abuse, the hurt I experienced and the fact I knew what was
being done to me was wrong, it took me over 10 years to come forward to the
authorities. Why didn’t I say anything? This is the question that I asked
myself again, and again and again. It’s the question I know everyone else was
asking. And it’s the question that plagues the millions of sexual abuse victims
around the world.
Even
though I wrote a whole book on the subject, the answer is quite simple: Because
I didn’t think anyone would believe me. In my case, my abuser was named the
International Hockey Man of the Year. In Canada, that gave him almost God-like
status. Sound familiar?
The
man who preyed on me took advantage of his position as a coach to look for
children who were especially vulnerable (single parent households, families
with drinking problems, boys who needed a father figure, etc.). These kids —
and often their parents too — looked up to him as a hero. This was someone who
could make their dreams come true and he used that trust to hurt them. This
imbalance of power and authority creates a deeper problem and it’s the one that
I think this subcommittee has to deal with head-on if you truly want to prevent
child abuse.
In
every case of child abuse — certainly in my own — there are people who had a
"gut feeling" that something was wrong but didn’t do anything about
it. Their attitude was, "I don’t want to get involved," "it’s
not my problem," "he couldn’t possibly be doing that" or "the
authorities will take care of it."
And
that’s what pedophiles and predators are counting on. They are counting on the
public’s ignorance or — worse yet — their indifference. That’s what keeps child
abusers in business. And that is what you have to address.
From
my experience, a child who is being abused has to tell — on average — seven
people before their story is taken seriously. Seven. That is completely
unacceptable.
When
my story became public in 1997, there were people who refused to believe it.
Many were angry that I had exposed an ugly side of their beloved sport.
Fortunately,
Hockey Canada responded seriously to my situation and made abuse-prevention
education mandatory for their 70,000 coaches. And this is the positive message
that I want to leave you with this morning.
Seven
years ago, I co-founded Respect Group Inc., in partnership with the Canadian
Red Cross and its internationally recognized experts in the prevention of child
abuse.
Together,
we launched an online training program for sport leaders called "Respect
in Sport." It focuses on educating all adult youth leaders on abuse,
bullying and harassment prevention including a sound understanding of your
legal and moral responsibilities.
Our
belief at Respect Group is that we may never fully eliminate child abuse, but by
empowering the 99% of well-intentioned adults working with our youth, we can
greatly reduce it. I am proud to say that, through Respect in Sport, we have
already certified over 150,000 youth leaders, which represents a high
percentage of all Canadian coaches.
Many
sport and youth-serving organizations have mandated the Respect in Sport
program, and the list continues to grow: Hockey Canada, Gymnastics Canada, the
Province of Manitoba, school boards and some early adopters here in the United
States, including USA Triathlon and USRowing. In addition, organizations such
as Hockey Canada and Gymnastics Canada have implemented our Respect in Sport
program designed specifically for parents.
We
also are seeing proactive initiatives by the Canadian government to combat
child maltreatment — not just tougher legislation and minimum sentences for
perpetrators — but a federal approach to prevention education that spans the
ministries that touch our most vulnerable youth.
We
have learned that social change takes time and has to occur at both the
grass-roots level and from the government on down. I am pleased to say that is
exactly what is happening in Canada, and I hope it’s what will happen here in
the United States, too.
Over
the years, through my work at Respect Group, I’ve learned that:
•Educating the good people — the
well-intentioned 99% of our population — is our best defence to prevent abuse;
•Training must be mandatory to ensure full compliance
and reduce liability;
•The education has to be simple and
consistent;
•All forms of abuse leave the same emotional
scars, so training has to be comprehensive;
•Education is best delivered online to ensure
consistency, safety of the learner, convenience and the greatest reach; and
finally,
•Training must be ongoing, it’s not a one-time
thing.
Too
often, society’s response to child abuse is to focus on punishing the criminal.
If the teacher, priest or coach is sent to jail for a long time, then we feel
that we’ve done our jobs as citizens or as politicians. Punishing the bad guys
makes us feel good, but it does not fully solve the problem. You need to give
all adults working with youth, and all parents, the tools to recognize and
respond to abuse when it first arises.
I
am under no illusion that such an approach will fully eliminate child abuse,
but I do know that mandatory education creates a platform within all
organizations for that conversation to happen. Empower the bystanders and
you’ll be taking an important first step in breaking the silence on child
abuse.
Visit
Respect Group Inc. to learn more about Sheldon Kennedy’s work.
Learn
more about Canadian Red Cross’ violence prevention work through its program
entitled RespectED: Violence & Abuse Prevention.
SHELDON
KENNEDY- 4 CHILD ABUSE SURVIVORS- CANADA
RED CROSS
RespectED
programs & services
Browse
Programs as a Learner »
A
learner is an individual who takes RespectED courses for interest or
professional development but is not interested in facilitating any of the
RespectED programs.
Browse
programs to find out how to become a RespectED Training Partner or Prevention
Educator »
A
RespectED Training Partner is a school or an organization that offers Canadian
Red Cross RespectED training for children, youth or adults using their
personnel who are trained as Prevention Educators or Trainers.
A
RespectED Prevention Educator is an individual sponsored by a RespectED
Training Partner who has successfully completed the RespectED Prevention
Educator Training program and has been certified to deliver specific programs.
How
do we partner with RespectED to deliver violence prevention programs in our
organization or community? »
AND..
CANADIAN RED CROSS- 4 KIDS...
How
We Help > RespectED:
Violence
Prevention
Print
RespectED:
Violence
Prevention
•RespectED
programs & services
•Become
a Prevention Educator
•For
youth
•Aboriginal
Communities and Healing
•c.a.r.e.
•Protect
your Kids Online
•Prevention
Nexus
•News
•Red
Cross OnLine Learning
•10
Steps to Creating Safe Environments for Children and Youth
•Protection
Legislation
•Contact
RespectED
•Evaluation
Studies
For
youth
Abuse,
violence, bullying: the hurt is real – and can be stopped.
You
have the right to be protected – and to be safe from violence. No one has a
right to harm you, to make you feel small or stupid, or to touch you how and
where you don't want to be touched. Not even people close to you. If this is
happening to you or a friend, if you are afraid or hurting, please ask for
help.
To
get help, you can:
•Tell an adult you trust, like a school
counselor, your parent or a friend's parent, your teacher or coach, a spiritual
leader or your uncle or aunt. Keep telling until you get the help you need!
•Contact
the Kids HelpPhone: 1-800-668-6868 or go to http://www.kidshelpphone.ca/
•Call
your local crisis line.
•Keep telling until you get help—and remember:
this is not your fault!
•Under 19? You have rights.
It's
easy to get sucked in... protect yourself!
It
could involve the exchange of sex for money or other valuable goods, such as
food, drugs or transportation - in other words, something you need. More»
Love
isn’t supposed to leave bruises.
As
many as 25 per cent of Canadian youth experience violence or abuse in a dating
relationship. Learn about the warning signs of an unhealthy relationship and
what you can do. More»
Stand
up to bullying.
One
in five Canadian youth reports being bullied regularly, but when a friend steps
in, bullying stops half the time in 10 seconds or less. Learn ways that you
stand up to bullying. More»
Become
a youth facilitator
The
Canadian Red Cross Beyond the Hurt program is a bullying prevention program
with a difference -- peer facilitation is what sets this school and community
program apart. Older peers, typically grades 10-12, are trained to deliver
presentations to youth, with the support of an adult in their school who is
also trained. More»
To
learn more about the Canadian Red Cross violence and abuse prevention program
or to become involved, contact your local Red Cross office.
You
Make the Difference – Support Programs that Help Prevent Violence and Abuse
RespectED
programs are made possible through the generous support of donors like you.
Please donate to the Canadian Red Cross Fund today.
------------------------------
ABUSED
CHILDREN'S HEALING MONUMENT- TORONTO-
CANADA
-----------------
NO
MORE BULLYING- NO MORE- CANADA'S STEPPING UP...
TO
CANADA'S CLASSIFIED... 4 EVERY KID IN THE WORLD- whether ur 2 or 102- we've all
been there...
see
u got that Inner Ninja going on- and don't 4get kids and elders are also ur
fans- u chisel ur words in stone on our hearts and bring hope from despair 4
homeless kids and kids who have just had a shitty chance at life- thanks
Canadian son... and taps out 2 David Myles who also has Canada's flag wrapped
around his heart and soul- the Buddy Holly of Canada
Classified
- Inner Ninja ft. David Myles
LINKS
ON BULLYING AND CHILD ABUSE- (Mind Rape/Physical Torture/Sexual Assault)
FOR
KIDS- TWEENS-TEENS-YOUNGBLOODS- But perhaps most of all..... each and every
Canadain Adult- we must take more responsibility and be more vigilant:
To
learn more about bullying and if u r being abused- check out:
RespectED:
Violence & Abuse Prevention
If
you are a victim of bullying, call The Kids Help Phone at 1-800-668-6868.
--------------------
Shania
Twain - Black Eyes, Blue Tears - Live!
LYRICS
"Black
Eyes, Blue Tears"
Black
eyes, I don't need 'em
Blue tears, gimme freedom
Positively never goin' back
I won't live where things are so out of whack
No more rollin' with the punches
No more usin' or abusin'
I'd rather die standing
Than live on my knees
Begging please-no more
Black eyes-I don't need 'em
Blue tears-gimme freedom
Black eyes-all behind me
Blue tears'll never find me now
Definitley found my self esteem
Finally-I'm forever free to dream
No more cryin' in the corner
No excuses-no more bruises
I'd rather die standing
Than live on my knees
Begging please-no more
Black eyes-I don't need 'em
Blue tears-gimme freedom
Black eyes-all behind me
Blue tears'll never find me now
I'd rather die standing
Than live on my knees, begging please...
Black eyes-I don't need 'em
Blue tears-gimme freedom
Black eyes-all behind me
Blue tears'll never find me now
It's all behind me, they'll never find me now
Find your self-esteem and be forever free to dream
Blue tears, gimme freedom
Positively never goin' back
I won't live where things are so out of whack
No more rollin' with the punches
No more usin' or abusin'
I'd rather die standing
Than live on my knees
Begging please-no more
Black eyes-I don't need 'em
Blue tears-gimme freedom
Black eyes-all behind me
Blue tears'll never find me now
Definitley found my self esteem
Finally-I'm forever free to dream
No more cryin' in the corner
No excuses-no more bruises
I'd rather die standing
Than live on my knees
Begging please-no more
Black eyes-I don't need 'em
Blue tears-gimme freedom
Black eyes-all behind me
Blue tears'll never find me now
I'd rather die standing
Than live on my knees, begging please...
Black eyes-I don't need 'em
Blue tears-gimme freedom
Black eyes-all behind me
Blue tears'll never find me now
It's all behind me, they'll never find me now
Find your self-esteem and be forever free to dream
----------------
LIFE
WITH BILLY- NOVA SCOTIA- THE MOST EVIL ABUSE ON A WOMAN
AND...
1
Billion Rising Lunenburg, nova scotia- CANADA
AND...
One
Billion Rising Antigonish
---------------------
One
Billion Rising-Break the Chains (Short Film)
-------------
ONE
IN THREE WOMEN WILL BE BEATEN, RAPED OR MURDERED ON THIS PLANET....Global Girl
Power Rising... and this is NOT just valentine's day...it's every day..... ONE
BILLION RISING
One
Billion Rising Lunapads & AFRIpads
From
Canada to Uganda, sister companies Lunapads and AFRIpads join forces across the
world in solidarity with the global One Billion Rising movement to "Strike,
Dance and RISE" against violence against women and girls.
Big
thanks to Tracy Bee for producing the video, Madeleine Shaw for the creative,
and Cortnee Loren Brown | Photography, Leona Fowler, Girlvana Yoga, and Global
Girl Power for use of their photos.
--------------
One
Billion Rising: Robert Redford on why he is joining Eve Ensler's campaign
------------------------
One
Billion Rising - Canada
Published
on Jan 27, 2013
I'm
Rising Because..."Over 50% of Canadian women by the age of 16 will have
experienced at least one incident of sexual or physical violence. Why Would You
Not Take Action? "
Toronto
City Councillor Kristyn Wong-Tam is Rising with One Billion Rising Toronto on
February 14, 2013.
Thank
you to fb.com/onebillionrisingtoronto for posting this Canadian perspective.
Danya Daccash, M.S.W.
-----------------------
One
Billion Rising - 2013 - IDLE NO MORE- 10,000 years First Peoples- Curve Lake
First Nation
---------------------
From
Nova Scotia to Afghanistan- every day is International Women's Day- One Billion
Rising- break the chains
The
dancing demonstrators of One Billion Rising - EURONEWS- IN AFGHANISTAN- THEY
MARCHED-
-----------------
Each
day is International Women's Day- 64% of
the world's population- ONE BILLION RISING- breaking the chains... No more
excuses... no more abuses...
BREAK
THE CHAIN - ONE BILLION RISING
-----------------
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